Planet AFT

This trip just keeps getting better.  This August, I am heading out the Los Angeles to see my first home Dodgers game.  I’ve always wanted to go to Chavez Ravine and have some Dodger Dogs and garlic fries under the palm trees.  I feel almost ashamed that I haven’t been there yet – it’s the third oldest stadium left in baseball and they’re my team.  I hope I get to have breakfast with Vin Scully.  We’re watching the Padres play the Bums, which should be fun because both teams are pretty good right now.

This takes the place of my previously scheduled baseball trip to Toronto, which was thwarted by the G20 summit taking place that week.  Yep, my tickets were moved from Toronto to Philadelphia – ugh.  But, I think I have a better trip now.  Dodgers and probably something like seeing some celebrity houses or the big ole Hollywood sign.  Maybe I can eat at a Del Taco or a Jack in the Box. 

After a couple of nights in LA hitting da clubs (insert techno music here), we are driving through the desert to Las Vegas and spending three nights gambling.  We had reservations to stay at New York, New York, which would be nice.  In the past, we have stayed at the MGM Grand and the Luxor.  They are all in about the same location, with comparable prices.  But this week, Kristin found a deal for us to stay at the Bellagio!  Double nice!  In Vegas, there are two types of casinos: the Bellagio and not-the-Bellagio.  We have a 600 square foot room in a casino in which we can’t afford to gamble!  Oh yeah!  When will we ever stay there again?  Well, maybe every time if my plan of parlaying about $1,000 into $100,000 goes perfectly.  I’ll keep you posted.

To get ready, last night I saw the end of Casino.  I hope one day my brother and I can be beaten with baseball bats and buried together in a corn field. 

Today we had a bomb threat called into school.  It didn’t amount to anything, although I guess if it did, you would have heard about it on the news.  Someone called and said there was a bomb in the school, and we immediately evacuated.  I hope they can catch the person that did this.  I don’t know what the penalty is if found guilty of something like this, but I hope it’s something awful.

When I heard the threat, my first thought was “yeah right,” but you have to take these things seriously.  I guess it’s better to evacuate as many times as necessary rather than to stay in and be wrong.  When we got out to the football field, a steady rain was coming down.  Luckily, there were about 4 umbrellas out there for the six hundred students, so we had that going for us.  About 45 minutes to an hour later, they let us come back in.

I know this isn’t the biggest thing, but this was during my planning period.  Not having kids, I really need my part of the day when I am away from the precious little people that inhabit my classroom.  If they had waited 5 minutes longer to call in the threat, I would have been at planning.  But we all danced out in the rain and gave ourselves ridiculous hair styles and had a chance to hang out with our friends and catch colds.

I guess it could have been worse.  Tomorrow starts the End of Grade tests.  I don’t want to think about what happens if some clown calls something else in tomorrow.  And there’s a part of me that believes that if we got one call, there’s a good chance we’ll get another, unless the person is a moron and called from their home phone or personal cell phone.  Here’s hoping they did exactly that.

Twenty days of school to go.

This week is the End of Grade tests, the week that decides if the students have learned and if the teachers have taught. What that means for me is that the regular school year is over. After these tests on Tuesday, Wednesday, and Thursday, the year is basically over. We'll do some things in class for the remainder of this week, but school is done.

We'll get the results back on Thursday evening or Friday morning and learn which kids passed and which kids didn't. At that point, we restructure our days to include a reteaching class for the kids that didn't pass their reading or math tests, and a enrichment class for those that did. Then we reteach or enrich for a few days, have field day, retest, and go home.

I kind of think the kids that pass get herded into rooms where nothing of real value gets done. Of course, I hope the kids I am reteaching get something valuable out of these classes, but who knows? I don't think I am going to teach a kid to read in 8 days of classes. I guess it's good to try – maybe a couple of extra days in class could help a few students.

I am of the opinion that every kid that passes should immediately start their summer vacation. School is done at that point, and, providing that they are passing all of their classes, they should be released into the wild so we can worry about the kids that didn't pass. If we did this, there would be more of an incentive to pass, since passing the test doesn't really decide if you go to the next grade or not. It would also allow teachers to have three weeks to teach much smaller classes to students that could use the extra time and attention.

I may be slightly tipsy when I write this.  I think I like the lack of defenses when I write.  IN fact, I choose to use no spell check for this.  Let’s se what happens…

I just watched M. Night Shaymaylan’s Unbreakable for like the 8th time,  That is an awesome movie. You know what I hate – bullies.  I hate the way in critic’s eyes, there is only one good M. Night movie.  There are other good movies – no, not The Village or The Happening, but I liked Signs and his signature pice, The Sixth Senbse. 

I love/hate that scene in Unbrekable when that guy just breaks into that house and is, lewt’s say bad.  Thee’s a big part of , me that identifies with the guy that stands up to bullires.  Thet’s the way I want to go out, defenidngf a defensless person/family.  That’s a good movie.  It’s not Sixgth Sense, biut it’s awresome.  I love the simplicity of the movie – he takes out a big villain with a rear naked choke hold.  That could be done by anybody, including mne.  I canb very easily identify with a guy that takes on a bad dude and defeats him by something I can (hypotheiccally do). 

But then again, I kind of like Samual L jackson’s character..  If I canb’t save the world, it would bew cool.  To destroy it.  Anyway, this is a grewat movie.  I’m feeling a little like this is a chapet from Flowers for Algernon, and maybe it is., biut it’s authrentic.  It’s a little bit like the romantics – it’s a real world look at something, albeit through slightly influenced eyes. 

Anyway, this many be a bad idea, bit it’s worth trying.  Tiem to go.  Later, 

So the head basketball coach comes up to me at school and asks me what day I wanted to have a Double Down.  I said I didn’t know what that meant, but it sounded dirty so tell me more about it.  He promptly explained that he was talking about Kentucky Fried Chicken’s new sandwich, the Double Down.  If you haven’t seen commercials for this yet, it is a food that signifies that you have completely given up on your life.  From the same people that brought you some awful concoction of everything in a bowl – if memory serves me correctly, it had something like mashed potatoes, peas, chicken, aluminum foil, Peeps, and some sort of sauce.  I never had this one, but the Double Down is something I would consider.

So what is it?  It’s simple enough.  No bread, instead two pieces of chicken replace them, and the piece de resistance, in the middle is cheese and bacon.  Yummy.  The coach told me not to worry – we’d get the chicken grilled so it wouldn’t be that bad for you.  I’d compare this to going to a baseball game and not having a hot dog and a beer.  Just a wasted opportunity.  So I said, if we’re going to do it, we’re going to do it right.  Fry my chicken!  At that point my assistant principal happened by, heard about the Double Down plan, and volunteered to join us.

The coach texted me and told me we were going to call the day “Double D Day.”  It seemed like that could be misconstrued, so I liked it.  Either way you look at it, a Double D day is a pretty good day.  So on Friday at lunch, I downed my first Double Down.  And, it was actually pretty good.  The colonel had those eleven herbs and spices working for him. And I felt pretty good for the first couple of bites.  Then I slowed down pretty fast.  I finished it, but not out of joy – more out of obligation.  I couldn’t have the other two downing theirs and just moving on.  It took me a while to finish it, but I got it down.

Now the trouble was keeping it down.  Man is not supposed to eat that type of food, especially not at age 37.  I started sweating and, kind of like a twisted, modern update of Macbeth, I could get the grease off my hands.  I washed them twice and still could feel the oil built up on my hands.  For 10-15 of my afternoon planning period, I lay on the floor in a teacher’s room and just breathed.  Kristin knew the dangers of me eating this, and insisted that I call her afterwards to make sure I was alive.

To make an epic tale short, I kept it down, but I think you should take this as a lesson in what not to do.  I finally had to go home and take a shower to feel clean again.  I urge you to try one for science, but then take a break and eat a vegetable or two.

Congratulations to Duke, this year's national champions. Ugh. How did this happen? I finally came out of my Tyler Hansbrough induced UNC national champions hangover on Monday night. It been a long time since I've feared a Coach K led Duke team, consistently full of three point chuckers, bad on the ball defenders, and big men that can play routinely small in big situations. Those teams of the early 90's - those teams were feared. The 2001 team was kind of a monster. Strong players. Mentally tough. Then came the JJ Redick years – I loved these Duke teams. Redick hits crazy shots and then some athletic team bounces them out of the tournament early. Since 2001, I've haven't considered Duke to be a legitimate contender. They just don't have the horses to get the job done.

This includes this year's team – the national champions. Sigh. I could talk about the easy path the championship game. Where was the tough match-up in their bracket? But, truth be told, they beat the teams in front of them and that's all you have to do. But, my point is, this team does not inspire fear. There is no Christian Laettner to stomp opposing players in the chest and hit big shots. There's no Shane Battier to draw charges by merely looking at a player. On this year's team, there's Napoleon Dynamite, Kyle Singler, and and Jon Scheyer, who makes nice facial expressions. Where's the fear this team inspires? Don't tell me it's from the bearded wonder, Brian Zoubek? How does this team win it all?

I get them being successful. I'm not stupid. At the beginning of the season, I fully expected them to go something like 28-5 and be a number 2 or 3 seed in the tournament. Good record, and out in the second round. It's the Duke way. Let's look at last year's winner – the University of North Carolina. Not that it means anything at all, but how many points better than this year's Duke team was last year's Carolina one? If you don't start out in double digits, you've got a short memory.

Granted, this year's Duke team could rebound. I can't think of another Duke team that could rebound the ball. But this is only part of Duke winning. Being a Carolina fan, and seeing Carolina suck this year, I focused less of my attention on my team, and more on top 25 teams. I saw a lot of Kentucky, Kansas, Georgetown, West Virginia, and Duke. After talking to my friend Steve today, I think I've discovered something in Coach K's philosophy that is straight up gold and should be copied by other teams.

I'm not a professional basketball analyst, but in my watching a large amount of top level teams this year – I got to do this when I wasn't watching my Heels, I found something that Duke did that I do not see other teams do. Before you say, “Chuck a thousand threes,” let me assure you that you are partly right. To me, Duke throws up 175 three pointers a game and makes 65% of them. How infuriating. This year, they hit about 38% of their threes. That's pretty darn good, but they seem to do that all the time. The great thing is one bad shooting game in the tournament always does them in. Always.

But here's where they are different this year. They rebound well, and without fail, every time a three pointer is taken by Duke and Zoubek or Lance Thomas grabs the offensive rebound, they kick it back out to the three point line for another shot by the big three shooters. It sounds simple, but it's brilliant. Shoot 38% from the arc and you're pretty good, but what happens if you get more than one three point shot on a possession? I'm not that good at math, but if you get two chances to make a three pointer on the same possession, there's a pretty reasonable assumption that you'll average higher than 38% per possession.

Think about it. It's tournament time, so Kyle Singler chucks a three, which badly clangs off the rim. The Beard grabs the missed shot, and kicks it out to Scheyer or Nolan Smith, who takes another three. One possession, two threes. No wonder they seem to hit everything. I don't think other teams do this. They take shots, but how many times to they take threes off offensive rebounds? Not as much as Duke.

Good for Coach K. It pains me to say this, but if other teams catch on, I think this could revolutionize the way coaches execute their offense. I think in a year or two, somebody will start talking about three point percentage per possession, and people will start to look into when you take your threes. Well done, rich, private schoolers. Your rich, smart team just out-thought everyone else to a championship.

I was watching the UNC football game on Saturday versus East Carolina.  Pretty fun game.  I’ve watched both televised games this year, which is strange for me.  I saw us get a gift of a safety on a holding call in the end zone a week ago and I saw us get a little officiating help this weekend.

TJ Yates had a great play action play for a touchdown.  ECU answered and we had us a ball game.  But with UNC up by a touchdown and driving into Pirate territory in the fourth quarter, we got a little gift.  Yates rolled out to his left on (I think) third down.  He was looking downfield for  an open receiver, but all were covered.  So as any good quarterback would do, he waited until he had no more time and then simply threw the ball out of bounds.   We get the field goal and all would be good.

But not so fast, my friend!  ECU was called for running into our quarterback after the play, which resulted in us getting a first down and pretty much putting the game out of reach.  I thought it was interesting though when they showed the replay that one of our offensive linemen pushed the Pirate defender into our quarterback.  If the referee had seen this, there is no way he would call a penalty.  Instead of a first down in the red zone, it would have been fourth down and time to make a field goal to put it out of reach.

I’m not saying we wouldn’t have won if we didn’t get this call.  We most likely would have, but we’ve had a lot of help the last two weeks.  I’m glad we’re in the top 25, but we’re playing Georgia Tech next weekend and that could be bad.  I’ll probably watch it – I don’t know why.  Maybe I should go see a game.  The last game I saw was when we lost to Furman.  That was like a decade ago.  Then again, I can see better from my red chair in my living room.

Making my plans to go to the movies yesterday made me realize I am a recluse-in-training. Kristin and I wanted to see Quentin Tarantino's Inglourious Basterds, so naturally we decided to go to Cary to see it. Why not go to Southpoint? Southpoint has great seats, sound, and large screens. However, it also has tons of annoying people. I don't think all people are annoying, just most people.

We decided to see it at the Galaxy. The Galaxy rocks. Although it's a good 20-25 minutes away, this is my preferred venue for seeing a movie. The seats aren't as good, the screens are a downgrade, and it's further away. But it's so less crowded, and the people there are people who love movies, not their cell phones, ipods, kids, girlfriends, whores, whatever. They are there to watch a movie.

Rarely is a movie at the Galaxy crowded, and even when it is, the people there seem to know how to act. They talk politely to each other, and shut the hell up when the movie is on. If children (for me, now 20 and below) are there, the parent know how to teach social norms and they let me see the movie, they don't run around, and I never see or hear a phone. Try doing that at Southpoint.

I like their movie selections (although not the Indian ones). The independent and the quirky are the ones I see. Plus, I can get good coffee or a beer at the theater. Over the last few years, Kristin and I have seen many excellent movies there – The Wrestler, Rachel Getting Married, Rocket Science, Juno, Goodbye Solo, Frost/Nixon – these are some of the movies I've had the chance to see there. Yes, most I could have seen somewhere else, probably much closer. But how much would I have enjoyed it?

Generally speaking, the less people there, the better. One of the best feelings is to go to a good movie in an empty theater. This leads me to believe that this is how other recluses started. I'm sure about the time To Kill a Mockingbird came out, Harper Lee was at a nickel theater thinking “How the hell am I supposed to enjoy this with those idiots over there?” So you never heard from her again. Bobby Fischer won some chess matches and most likely thought, “This would be better if I could play against a computer and not this Russian dude.” And after winning the World Series, Sandy Koufax most likely thought, “Baseball would be cool without all these roaring fans. I'm headed to Cape Cod.” I think that's where I'm heading, although I shouldn't tell you because you may try to meet me there.

I think while I’m in pretty decent shape, my mind is in training camp right now.  I like to take the summer to decompress (or decompose) and just relax, have fun, and not think too much.  I work my cushy summer job, surf the internet, and write a charming and witty blog.  Baseball, beer, movies, video games, running – that’s about it.

My teacher workdays are serving as a makeshift training camp for my brain.  Meetings, learning new policies and dress codes, new classes to teach, new teachers to mentor, new positive behavior systems, new processes and procedures, etc.  It takes a lot of effort to learn how to do so many things in a short amount of time.  While most days during the summer, it wasn’t uncommon for me to stay up to 11:30 or later, last night I went to bed around 9:30, and that was only after really trying to stay up once 8:45 hit.

I’m thinking my mind worked too hard, kind of like when you don’t lift weights for a long time and then you think you can just start out at some incredible weight.  The next morning you can barely function.  That’s me, but mentally.  I’m hoping after my mind catches up, I’ll slip into a more acceptable bedtime.  I think 10:00 sounds like a reasonable time to call it a night.  I’m going to try to stay up that late tonight, but no guarantees.  I mat just have to accept (again) that I go to bed early during the school year. 

I like Starbucks coffee and their little fancy drinks. Today I had some sort of java chip frappacino. It was delightful – like a coffee milkshake. What size do you ask? Medium.

Grande did you say? Nope. Medium. Mee-dee-ummm. You can call it whatever you want to, but it's a medium. If Kristin does the ordering she plays by the rules and says their little made-up words. But not me. Usually the barista doesn't care, but every once in a while one likes to tell me the correct name for a medium.

I'll say medium coffee. Barista asks, “Grande?” I respond, “If that's a medium. I want a medium.” Sometimes if they don't understand, I play a quick game of charades and act out medium, like I was in the Three Little Bears. I haven't said it's the size that's just right, but I'm close.

These names serve no purpose, other than to allow them to charge more for their coffee. How much for a medium coffee? $1.25. How 'bout a grande? Oh, that's different. That's on our upscale menu, for members only. That comes to $1.75.

In my life, there are precious few opportunities to frighten Kristin with a plastic spider.  This will be the exclamation point at the end of my summer.  I can see all my fans, many with their lighters flicked on, hands extended, waiting for me to come back out for one more song.  Yes, this is my encore. 

Kristin, like many of us, is not a huge fan of spiders.  I remember once when I used to work with her, I came into the office to find a spider under a cup with a little note which said something like, “I’ve been scaring people – please take me outside.”  Why do I do things like this?  Oh, sure, the easy answer is that I’m a jerk.  But I prefer to think of it as me being the kid that pulls the pigtail of the girl he likes.  I think in the long run she’ll appreciate it.

Here I am, on the last day before my teacher workdays start, sitting in my favorite red chair, just content and ready for a new year of learning.  I know in ten minutes or so, Kristin will come in, give me a peck on the cheek, and head into our newly painted office to get on the elliptical machine.  Once that is finished, she’ll obviously want a shower to cool off.  Hmmm.  Very interesting.  Provocative.  I’ve secretly placed my favorite fake spider behind her bottle of shampoo.  Oh, I’m going to get it for this.

I don’t know how I can play this off.  “Oh, so there’s where my little pet went.  Thank you for returning him.”  Nope, I’m just going to have to take it on the chin.  What I do in the name of messing with my beautiful wife.  She’s my best friend.  In time, she’ll forgive me.

Oh, and if anyone has any extra fake spiders, please let me know.  I’m pretty sure this one isn’t going to be in my possession for long.

I have been playing NCAA Football 2010 on my PlayStation 3. I've had the game for a few weeks and am enjoying the graphics, extra player movements, and the wide array of plays. I haven't had this game in a few years and the time off has made me appreciate this game. And this year, I decided to try my skills online.

For two solid weeks I just looked at the online option and was too nervous to try it. What if I got killed? So one night, after putting Kristin to bed, I decided to give it a shot. I clicked on play now and presto, right away another player was right there. I was very nervous because traditionally, when I'm not playing Dan, I get killed. But I intercepted the ball on the first play and went on to score a touchdown. I beautifully set up pass plays with runs and I was on, destroying my opponent by several scores. I went to bed feeling like a champion.

But who was I playing? A skilled twenty-something, home from college, with a knowledge of football and video games? Maybe an eight-year-old girl? Someone's senile grandmother? I don't know, but a win is a win. I decided to play again the next day and was getting killed by three touchdowns before I had a bit of luck and actually took the lead in the fourth quarter. I ended up losing, but the victor gave me a “good game” before he signed off. That made me feel worthy.

Then I tried again. Loss. Another time. Huge loss. Once more. It featured a blowout so awful that the opponent granted me mercy at halftime. That means I lose, but I didn't have to have my teeth kicked in for another half. Over the last couple of weeks I have developed a consistent ability to lose and lose huge. I record stood at 1-9 until I played some fool that I was able to scrap by this afternoon. I'm back, baby! 2-9 with a bullet! Yeah. I don't need to win a lot, just enough to keep my interest.

I've learned there are different levels you can play so I'm playing in the lowest level – strangely I am a level 1 player (levels go from 1-100). Maybe one day I'll be a level 2. That would be nice. I see how people could really get into playing online – it would be nice to have a friend of mine I could kill in this game online. No, I would want them in my house – good lord, then I'd have to talk to them. Ugh.

The games take a while to play – usually about an hour, but as long as I'm reasonably in the game, I like playing and I think I'm getting better. I believe there is some way for me to play during the football season against the teams UNC will actually play, but I'll have to wait for the season to start to see what that is all about. Now I'm going to have to try boxing online – I bet that could get brutal.

Being a Dodgers fan, my watching of my favorite team consists of a handful of nationally televised games, either Sunday night games on ESPN or when they make the East coast swing and play teams that get regular coverage – Phillies, Mets, Cards, Cubs.  Other than that, my fandom dictates that I read about games online and I catch replays of the games that started after I went to bed.  I’ve said for years that I need some East Coast representation, but I can’t give up on my favorite team.

When they are competitive, it’s great!  Regular highlights appear on my TV, including last night’s.  The Bums were losing 4-2 in the bottom of the ninth when Andre Ethier saved the day by jacking a three run walk off bomb that beat the Braves 5-4.  It’s a great feeling when your team snatches a victory from a team like that, but I wanted to focus on what probably has to be the best feeling in sports.  The mob at home plate after pulling off such a feat of awesomeness.

I never hit a home run in high school so I am very much living vicariously through others when I see things like this.  I got close one time in the playoffs.  It was my senior year and I got a fastball in my wheelhouse and just turned on it.  That’s a great feeling.  I watched it explode off the bat towards the left-centerfield wall, dropped the bat, and watched from home plate the payoff for all of my hard work through my high school career.  It was magical until it hit the top of the wall about two feet from the top and bounced back onto the warning track.  Crap.  I had to sprint as fast as I could to barely make it to second.  Oh well.

So anyway, I’ve imagined how this scene would play out should I ever be in a situation where I was at the plate and hit a walk off homer.  The crowd rises to its feet and I hear the deafening roar as I circle the bases.  The third base coach slaps me on the back and I toss my batting helmet into the air as I jump onto home plate.  I’ve always enjoyed seeing everyone jump around in unison while they more or less beat the guy who hit the home run about the head and back.  That is what I want.

And since I’m not hitting a homer like this, I still want this to happen.  Maybe for my fortieth birthday or something like that, it would be nice to talk a group of friends into meeting me at a baseball or softball field.  Then I could run around the bases and be congratulated and have a celebration.  Then, off to some place for some beers.  That would be nice.

I have school on Monday!  Well, kinda.

I have an all day meeting there so we can put together our English/Language Arts pacing guide for the year.  It’s where we decide when we will teach about metaphors and adjectives and author’s purpose.  I guess it’s a good idea to make sure I’m covering everything on the curriculum, but I’m not particularly jazzed about it.  I think I more or less know what I’m supposed to teach and my quick fix is I’ll teach it on about the same schedule as last year.  Sounds good?  Awesome.  See you guys later.  But I guess an 8:00-3:30 meeting will be fun.

Having to report back to school has me thinking about school and how I have about a week before workdays begin.  Last year was a decent year for my school.  We were one of a handful of schools in our district to achieve “School of Distinction” status, which means between 80-89% of our students passed their reading and math tests at the end of the year.  We also met our ABC goal.  The ABCs are linked to the No Child Left Behind law where schools are graded on how different subgroups perform on the end of grade tests.  We have twentyish subgroups, like American Americans or girls or EC or economically disadvantaged and have to meet the expected level in all groups.  If you do that, you get money.  Meet expected growth and I can expect a $750 bonus.  Meet high growth and it’s more like $1,500.  I’ve been fortunate to get the expected growth bonus several times already.

Check that.  Meet the ABCs and you got money.  As in used to, bro.  Now our reward for meeting this goal is a congratulations.  I certainly like praise, but I think I respond better to money.  It’s the only bonus I could get – this makes me I think I would do well in some sort of merit-based pay system.  Of course it would have to be linked not only to how many kids passed that one big test at the end of the year.  That could be part of it.  I guess you would also have to look at growth of a child – where they began the year and where they ended it.  Anyway, I am proud that we accomplished what we set out to do, money or not.

This year I will be mentoring another new teacher.  I’ll be at school next Wednesday to show her the ropes and watch her try to catch all of the pearls of wisdom that fall from my mouth.  It makes me feel appreciated to be asked to help someone else.  Maybe they want another Ed, like version 2.0.  Maybe once I train her, they will put me out to pasture.  Hmmm.  Well, I’ll train her, but I won’t teach her everything.  It will be kind of like the end of Rocky III when Apollo and Rocky fight for fun and Apollo lets the Italian Stallion know that he didn’t teach him everything he knows.  I believe he says, “Remember, you fight great, but I’m a great fighter.”  Yeah, in your face Balboa!  I’ll do the same thing one day to this teacher.  Ah, this is sure to be a great relationship.

The other new thing this year for me is that I will be teaching a new class called Literacy First.  It’s like a reading class, but it’s designed just for kids that are reading well below grade level.  There might be 4 kids in there that read on a fourth grade level , five that are on the fifth, and so on.  My goal is to increase their reading levels by more than one grade level in the course of one year, while at the same time getting them to enjoy reading.  I think it sounds like a pretty good idea.  We should have a plan to help these struggling readers before they get to high school, can’t understand anything, and drop out.  I’ve gone to a two-day training, have three more days scheduled during the year, and they gave me a big binder and six books to read!  Six!  I guess I will start reading now.

Space is at a premium.  If you live in the big city, you’ll notice architects build up, constructing hundreds of stories of offices and apartments above ground level.  This is because the city is trying to pack in as many people and stores as possible into a finite area.  That is the same problem I am facing in my tiny house.  How can I maximize my extremely limited space?

I suppose everyone has clutter, but I am in the process of streamlining my living spaces to clear away the useless.  This weekend, that meant adding a shelving system in a few of my closets.  I call this development Phase I – one closet in my office, the coat closet as you enter my house, and the laundry closet area – all of these received fresh new shelves to help me organize.  Now I have a place for all of Kristin’s 75 matching gloves and hats as well as my scarf.  Christmas decorations and my space heater and my sleeping bags all have an assigned area.  It’s very comforting.  And the best part is that my dad and I did the work.  I bought the lumber, we measured, cut, and leveled, and it looks pretty decent.  I learned how to use a circular saw.  I rule.

Now it’s on to Phase II.  This is another step in the streamlining of my house.  I’ve created new spaces for my tchotchkes as well as Kristin’s glass menagerie, but now I need to remove items.  This starts with clothes – I have a ton of things that I just never wear, and I have some things that I just shouldn’t wear (like a 1991 high school basketball playoffs shirt – it still kind of fits).  In my younger days, I collected books I read like a serial killer with memorable body part trophies.  But why?  Is someone going to come to my house, see that I have all the Alex Cross novels and give me a pat on the back?  I didn’t think so.  So in addition to my old clothes, I’m going to rid my life of most of these books.  Both of these items can be donated somewhere, and I guess I could sell the books on eBay, but that seems like a hassle. 

Phase II will continue with the removal of my desktop computer from my house – with my tiny netbook, who needs it?  That will allow me to throw out my computer table, which is big and rickety.  Sometime in the next week, I’ll have to coerce one of my nerdy friends to come to my house and move my wireless internet thingy from the office to the living room.  Moving to the bedroom, I will move our small television to our dresser and remove this heavy, ugly computer desk from my life.  Less clutter will equal more space, and space is the key.  Maybe I’ll add some mirrors to both rooms.  Mirrors make rooms look bigger, and I always enjoy looking at myself.

Throw in a new paint to both the office and the bedroom, add some new blinds and curtains, and you have the gist of Phase II.  Maybe I should frame something and add some things to the walls.  Now, all I have to do is get this done before school starts.

From now on, if something bad happens to you, I would like for you to start using the Ed Scale of Annoyance, or ESA to describe how awful the event was to you.  It’s basically a scale from one to ten, with ten being the worst, and you can track how annoyed you are by the similarity of your feeling to the annoyance I have described by each number. 

ESA Levels

1)      Order Mangled – This is when you go to a restaurant, order something delicious, and the server brings you something else.  If you say something, they’ll remedy the situation.  It’s not the worst thing in the world, but it makes you think “Was this person listening to me?” 

2)      Facebook Attack – This is a little more annoying.  This refers to all your real friends and work friends that won’t shut up about Facebook.  I know it’s changed your life and now you have found that guy who owed you $10 back in 1988, but I don’t give a damn. 

3)      Bad Beer – I know some may say this should be higher on the scale, but relax man.  You’re still drinking a beer, which means you’re probably relaxing at your house with your woman.  It’s all good.  Yeah, you should have spent a little more on a quality six pack, but it’s not going to kill you.  You should realize that you’re no longer in college and required to drink Coors Lite.

4)      Pyramid Scheme – I got tricked into going to a pyramid scheme meeting when I was in college, and I’ll relate this feeling to the time I caught my first girlfriend cheating on me.  Just rip out my heart, why don’t you?  I thought you were my friend, but you just wanted me to sell stuff so you can get a percentage.  There were all these pyramid scheme posse members sitting all around me, acting like they didn’t know about the scheme, but that they were truly interested in what this dude was telling them.  I hate a liar.

5)      Hero Failure – Nothing is worse than looking up to an athlete as being super awesome and perfect, and then find out that they are the same crap-filled crap as the rest of us.  I remember when Eric Gagne went over a year without blowing a save – he was mythical.  When his music blared as he came in from the pen, it really was Game Over!  Oh yeah, he was juicing so all my memories are tainted.  Larry Bird turned out to have a kid he ignored.  I guess that evens out his stealing the ball from Isaiah Thomas.  At least Peyton Manning is still without any flaws at all.

6)      Cavity Repair – Ow!  The pain is definitely sharper now.  God!  Why are you poking that metal stick in the only little hole in my tooth?  I already feel like a loser for not taking care of my property and now you’re just going to needle me.  Here, let me fix this for you, you lazy, good for nothing, waste of space.  And that judging glare whenever the word flossing is mentioned. 

7)      Tapas – Few things in life are as annoying as tapas.  It comes from my hatred for sharing and this is what tapas is all about.  Little, tiny plates of cute things that you’re supposed to pass around the table.  Ooh, try this!  And there about as expensive as a big plate that I could have eaten myself.  Instead of getting to enjoy a meal, my stress level raises as who knows what is going to be forced on me with the next pass of the plate.  Tapas?  No thanks.

8)      Fender Bender – Last Spring Break, I was turning left onto Stagecoach Road from Farrington and some dude decided that a car turning in front of him was no reason to wait before accelerating.  He crashed right into my driver’s side door, and then tried to tell the policeman that I ran into him.  This is awful.  Yeah, you’ll get your car fixed by his insurance, but you’ll be inconvenienced by the whole ordeal and your car will never be as good as it was.

9)      Fantasy Discussions – I’m glad you play Fantasy Football, but I would rather be in a car accident or share before I hear about the tight end you picked up in the fifth round of your draft for nothing.  I don’t really like football, and you discussing great trade deals or pulling for a running back to score a touchdown instead of a quarterback throwing for a score infuriates me.  If you have to play some silly game to get you to watch a sport, maybe you don’t like that sport as much as you think.

10)   Toddlers & Tiaras – Nothing is worse than this.  In my 36 years on this planet, the worst I have ever felt is when I witnessed a commercial for Toddlers & Tiaras.  It is a program of babies dressed up like whores with horrible attitudes.  They complete in little pageants and teach me that when we think humanity can’t go any lower, the people from TLC will get a shovel and start digging.  If you ever experience this feeling, you deserve to take a personal day and just go home.  You’ll be no good to be around people for a while.

I just found out that yesterday was the thirtieth anniversary of the death of Thurman Munson.  I don’t know a lot about Thurman Munson, but I do know that he played catcher for the New York Yankees for about a decade and that he was one of the fan favorites.  He died when his plane he was flying crashed while he was practicing takeoffs and landings.  He wasn’t a Hall-of-Famer, but he seemed like a good person and a blue collar player that you would want on your team.

Having played ten seasons behind the plate, his career was probably on the decline, but the Yankee team captain was cut down, more-or-less, in the prime of his career.  From a small sample of the population (the woman who works in the cubicle beside me), I learned that Munson was the type of player that even Yankee haters liked and respected.  I guess that’s kind of like the way today’s Yankee haters feel about Derek Jeter, or the way I feel about Grant Hill.  Even though he played for Duke, he’s one of those guys who it is impossible to hate.

Being the team captain, playing catcher, and spending his entire career with one team, I guess the closest comparison I can think of from today is someone like the Red Sox’s Jason Varitek.   He’s not the best player on his team, but he’s a guy that most people respect and would want on their team.  If something happened to a player like that in his prime, or just past it, I don’t know how I would feel. 

The closest thing I can relate Munson’s death to for me is when I found out that Len Bias died back in 1986.  It’s obviously not the same because Bias never even played in a professional game, let alone ten seasons, but Bias was near and dear to my heart from the way he destroyed teams on the basketball court.  Regarding Munson, it had to be strange to see someone playing one day and the next day, they are gone for good.  For the Yankees, they never allowed anyone to use his locker after that day in 1979, and they even moved it over to New Yankee Stadium and placed it in their museum.  It’s a nice tribute.

It's interesting to note that the Yanks have had three players die in plane crashes, including Corey Lidle in 2006. 

I was skimming a few baseball sites yesterday and I came across an essay by Bill James from his Historical Baseball Abstract.  You can find it here. For those who don’t know Bill James, he’s the stat nerd that served as the catalyst for teams looking at different stats to determine a player’s value.  His sabermetrics were used by Billy Beane as described in Michael Lewis’ Moneyball to get good players that were overlooked by other teams.  I think many teams have or are adopting this statistical approach to acquiring players.

Anyway, his essay talks about how one determines which young, starting pitchers will have solid careers.  And his answer is strikeouts.  James prognosticates that a young pitcher that doesn’t average at least 4.5 strikeouts per nine innings isn’t going to have much of a career in the majors.  I suppose the reasoning is that a pitcher can control strikeouts by himself, thus placing a lesser need on the fielders behind him to get outs.  If you can strike out 10 batters in a game, that’s only 17 outs that the defense needs to come up with for you.  Obviously, to strike someone out, your stuff has to be pretty good, and if you can’t average 4.5 in your early years, you won’t be sticking around too long.

And I guess that makes sense to me.  And in case you were wondering, my new favorite player on the Dodgers, Clayton Kershaw, the lefty, is 21 and averaging 8.5 strikeouts every nine innings.  That should get the job done.  And Chad Billingsley, while I’m at it, average 8.5 too.  And there are some other youngsters, all in their first couple years of pitching that are averaging about a strikeout every inning.  Some ones I found in a quick search included Zack Greinke (Royals), Tim Lincecum (Giants), David Price (Rays), Gio Gonzalez (A’s), and Joba Chamberlain (Yankees).  If 4.5 strikeouts per game is the baseline, then one an inning should these players quite well for some time.

And since today is the trading deadline, I was looking at some teams that are farm teams for the contenders, such as the Pirates and Royals.  I was wondering if any of their young starters would be snatched up and suddenly become awesome if they were in pinstripes.  I chose three pitchers, just for fun, Charlie Morton (Pirates), Luke Horchevar (Royals), and John Lannon (Nationals).

Charlie Morton – 26 years old, 3.72 ERA, 1.40 WHIP, and over 6 strikeouts a game.

Luke Horchevar – 26 years old, 5.28 ERA, 1.30 WHIP, and over 5 strikeouts a game.

John Lannon – 25 years old, 3.25 ERA, 1.30 WHIP, but only 3.6 Ks per nine innings.

According to this one stat, the one of these three to avoid is the one with the lowest ERA.  It’s interesting food for thought, and I realize that a little bit of information is a dangerous thing.  So, if you’re a GM for a major league baseball team and this is how you’re deciding who will be thrown in on a last minute trade, good luck.  I hope you make the right decision, unless you work for the Giants – then I hope you choke.

It’s been 15 years since Pulp Fiction came out.  Damn.

On August 21st, Quentin Tarantino releases a new movie, Inglourious Basterds.  I’ve been waiting since the Kill Bill movies for a Tarantino flick that excites me.  And that was five years ago.  Sorry, the Grindhouse movie with the woman with a shotgun for a leg didn’t get me to lay down my $8.50.  I’m hoping this new one will be more to my likings and will rank up there with Pulp, Bill, or Reservoir Dogs. 

The signature of a good Tarantino film is the excellent dialogue followed by graphic, over-the-top violence.  Cutting that policeman’s ear off, shooting Marvin in the face – these events stay with you, and they contribute to the plot.  There was some decent dialogue and violence in Jackie Brown, but this one didn’t keep my interest.  I will say that I always enjoy the first half of From Dusk ‘til Dawn, up until everyone turns into zombies and tries to kill George Clooney.  I’m pretty sure I didn’t like it because I’m not really wired for horror films, and I tuned out the instant sexy, stripping Salma Hayek stopped taking her clothes off and turned into a lizard woman.

The other Tarantino staple is the “I’m showing the scenes out of chronological order thing,” but I hope he’s past that – it worked for Reservoir Dogs and Pulp Fiction and Kill Bill, but having every movie like this seems a little cliché now.  I can think your movie is good even if I don’t see the end in the first ten minutes.

Inglourious Basterds has the potential for greatness.  For me, it’s like looking at a list of ingredients and having your mouth start to water.  We have the violence and the dialogue, and then we’re going to set the story in Nazi Germany and have the Jews go after Hitler.  Nice.  Oh, and Brad Pitt’s there too.  Brad Pitt can play any role – comedic, serious, or badass – and play them extremely well.  Is that enough for you?  It is for me.

I probably won’t go see it opening night or even that weekend.  I know, even though it will be rated R, that my enjoyment of this film will go down with the population around me.  The rating should keep the adolescents away for the most part, but some fool will be there playing on his phone or talking or squeezing in beside me.  I’ll probably wait 2-3 weeks and let the crowds die down, and then catch a matinee.  I’m hoping it is as good as the ingredients suggest.

Kristin never believes me when I tell her that when I was a kid, I had a speedometer on my bike and I regularly could go as fast as 30-35 mph.  But I did!  I’m not saying I was ready for the Tour De France, but I could annoy the cars that went down my street by racing against them as doing well for a stretch.  You tack on a 1986 Topps Paul Assenmacher in the spokes and you have a mean machine (not the Bo Jackson – duh).

I kind of like the Tour De France.  Like most things, I can watch it if it’s in HD, and I respect these athletes for both the cardiovascular dominance as well as the flat out willpower to succeed.  I think the first time I ever watched any of the tour as it was actually happening  was when we were out in Seattle a few years back and I remember getting coffee and seeing the last couple miles.  Back then, it was all about Lance Armstrong, who was winning one of his 43 straight titles (I didn’t have time to check this number, but it seems about right).

Now it’s Alberto Contador who’s the man now, dog, the one who was able to pedal faster than the all the others for the entire 2,200 miles.  That’s about 100 miles a day on average, with the racers regularly reaching speeds of 40-50 mph, sometimes more.  The most I’ve ever ridden in a day is the 13 mile roundtrip I sometimes rock on the Tobacco Trail so well-played, Contador, well-played indeed. 

This year’s tour included a sixty year old woman getting run over as part of the festivities.  Her death was the tenth death in the history of this race.  Four of these deaths were cyclists; one biker fell off a ravine to his death.  And apparently, there have been incidents of citizens running onto the course and attacking the athletes – this includes the BB gun incident recorded this year.  I guess this helps me realize that there are crazy idiots everywhere.  I usually think roughly 100% of insane losers are from my country, not others.  I mean, I guess that lone gunman could be Dick Cheney, but I don’t have any proof.

There’s something about the tour that I don’t understand.  Lance Armstrong and Alberto Contador were on the same team this year, but didn’t like each other and I guess it hurt the team.  Am I missing something?  Why do you need teams for this bike race?  Are you going to run someone off a pick or have to pick up another biker after a particularly vicious chop block?  Teams in Nascar is something I get – drafting, blocking someone, etc, but you get penalized for blocking someone in cycling.  I have an idea.  How about pedal hard and try to win?  Does that work for a team strategy?  Go team.

Oh, and I did used to top 30-35 mph so deal with that!

I tried my first Wii Fit on Sunday.  Previously, all I had known about the Wii Fit was that you could find some sweet YouTube videos of some dude’s girlfriend hula-hooping in her underwear.  I was at Dan and Erin’s and they started me out by creating a character that looked somewhat like me – they said tall, a little facial hair, and evil, beady eyes.  Um, I guess that works.  Then I stepped on the little pad, which looked like a weight scale.

I’ve heard tales of people stepping on these things and their created character ballooning out to look like a Weeble Wobble.  I was afraid this was going to be my fate, even though I’m relatively thin and I’ve been running regularly.  Fortunately, when I stepped on, I was right in the normal range, and then the Wii went about putting me through a few balance tests to determine my Wii Fit age.  I think this is how your balance and agility compare to others on the Wii.  With my knees being a little suspect, the Wii told me my age was 44.  Sigh.  Oh well.

So Stan & Tiny E put me through the motions:  hula-hooping, tight-rope walking and jumping, yoga, and boxing.  The yoga was surprisingly entertaining – I’ve tried actual yoga 3-4 times and I think it would be the perfect thing for my knees, back, and general flexibility, but I hate all that “now relax and go to your place of serenity and peace” crap.  Just stretch me – I don’t need you getting in my head.  On the Wii, I definitely got a workout in just 6-8 minutes.  Just imagine what that would feel like if I did that for 30 minutes a day.  My right knee felt a little weak and shaky after a minute or two, but this type of low impact, kind of fun workout was right up my alley.  If I did this more often, I think I would not strain as much when I get out of a chair or climb out of my tiny car.  I’ve thought about trying yoga at my gym, but those ladies there are intimidating and aggressive.  I see them lining up, jostling each other for position.  I don’t want to get in the way of that, or accidentally take someone’s spot and end up getting a roundhouse kick to the face. 

Anyway, the Wii yoga was fun as was the boxing, however there didn’t seem to be a lot of strategy to the boxing, just move your controllers as fast as you can.  This was a much better workout than I typically get on my PlayStation 3, which I can do while drinking several beers.  Game play and graphics – I’ll happily take the PS3, but that Wii Fit is unique and you won’t turn into a couch potato if you use it.  It was a nice change of pace and it was very social with the peanut gallery laughing at me the entire time. 

If I had one of these, I would be compelled to play it relentlessly until I got my Wii age down to my actual one.  Oh, and then I’d have to try to see if I could do it with a few drinks in me.  Natch.  And I saw on the news today that there is a new Wii Fit sport game coming out – fencing, boating, and Frisbee tossing – that could be fun.  With schools and parents buying these, hopefully our entire nation won’t look like the state of Wisconsin. 

With less than a week to go until the trade deadline, as a Dodgers fan, I am very excited that we are pretty much guaranteed to make the playoffs and have home field advantage throughout the National League portion of the festivities.  I don’t think this team is unbeatable, but I think they are young with a lot of future All-Stars.  Now is the time for teams that think they have a real shot at winning the whole thing to make a move and deal some of their young talent for some gutsy veteran to finish the job.

The Dodgers have a young team and seem to be built to be a strong contender for years.  They have youth all the way around and could improve if they jump into the running for future Phillies #1 starter, Roy Halladay.  But I don’t want them to trade their best babies for this dude.  He’s 32, and although I can’t find anything online to support my memory, it seems like every other year he absolutely dominates in the first half of the year and then fades a bit as the season continues.  You can’t argue with his numbers: 11-3, 2.62 ERA and an excellent 1.05 WHIP, but what is the tradeoff?

If the boys in blue have to give up either one of their brightest, young starting pitchers, namely Chad Billingsley or Clayton Kershaw, I say thanks, but no thanks.  At 25, Billingsley has just started to come into his own and could be a solid #1 or #2 pitcher for a decade or more.  His 10-5 record, 3.72 ERA, and 1.29 WHIP are good, and with so much potential, he could be scary.  And I think Kershaw will end up being our dominant guy for a long, long time.  His upside seems better than Billingsley.  He’s 8-5 with a 2.96 ERA and a 1.26 WHIP, but he is just figuring out how to pitch.  In his last 7 starts, he has gone 5-0 and allowed something like 4-5 earned runs.  Best of all, he’s 21!  21!  He can barely drink legally.  Oh, and did I mention he’s a lefty?  Who trades that away?

This reminds me of a young pitcher we had back on 1993.  To preserve his anonymity, let’s just call him Pedro M.  A young phenom, with a ton of upside was traded for Delino DeShields.  This trade definitely worked out (for the Expos), but not so much for the Bums. 

With Halladay’s at his peak and on the cusp of falling, how much longer is he going to go?  Three years maybe?  And if you’re going for this year, at best, he will get about ten or eleven starts.  How many more victories will this create?  Halladay will be traded for his playoff impact, which could be significant in a short series, but I’d like to dance with the ones that brung ya.  Why not have Billingsley and Kershaw announce their presence with authority in October?  While I’d love to see a bonafide proven ace with the Dodgers, I don’t want this to happen at the expense of these two young guns.

When you buy something expensive, how long should it last? You know, like a car or a television or caps on your teeth? The answer should be somewhere between eight years and forever. I've been paying for my car for almost five years and should have it completely paid off in another six months. Naturally, I think it will be nice if it lasts a few years past my last payment.

How about a new door, say a new French door with fancy mini-blinds on the inside of the glass? How long should this reasonably be expected to function properly?

A) less than a week

B) more than a week, but less than a year

C) between one-three years

D) between three-five years (nothing is forever man – damn!)

If you chose “A,” then you would be living in my reality. There was a bit of rain on Monday and I came home to find a puddle roughly the size of Rhode Island in my living room. I seem to remember just having purchased a door last week, although I don't remember asking if I bought one that kept the freakin' water out of my house. Buyer beware, I guess. Not to rant too much, but I immediately called both Home Depot and the contractor to let them know I wasn't 100% happy with my purchase. I didn't receive a call that night, so I tried again on Tuesday. I spoke to a very nice man who took my information and assured me I would hear from them that day. But I didn't.

So today, I called the HD and told the customer service lady about my problems. I told her that she probably wanted to pass me over to Jeff, the magic man, who makes everything better. But he doesn't. He just talks pleasantly and then leaves you, cold and wet, to face your door problem on your own. I asked if there was someone higher up on the food chain I could speak to. Soon enough, I got Barry, the floor manager. After I explained that I felt like Home Depot didn't have to do anything after they got my money and that all I wanted was someone to hold me and tell me everything is going to be all right, he jumped on it. I just wanted someone to tell me that my door should keep out the elements. Then I needed them to tell me to go back inside, chill out, and wait for the cavalry which should be coming directly.

Which he did. So now I'm waiting for the Wolf. He should be here soon.

Last night, I had the opportunity to catch the WWE’s Raw broadcast, which took place at the RBC Center.  Dan was able to score seats in Red Hat’s box for him, Harper, Bobby, Dwight, and me, along with a special VIP parking pass which allowed us to park 68 steps from the arena.  My brother didn’t realize we had the box seats for the night, which totally is the way to go.  There were about 6-7 other people in the box, but we all were able to sit on bar stools behind the main seats and enjoy the show, along with our own personal bathroom.  As a decorating note, the toilet in the box was black, which made me think that I have often suggested brown as the toilet color for my house.  Why fight an uphill battle?

It was an entertaining show, highlighted by a main event  featuring  John Cena and Triple H versus Legacy (Randy Orton, Ted Debiase, and Cody Rhodes).  Leading into a pay-per-view, we were sure the bad guys would win, but good prevailed and everyone went home happy.  Among others, we saw Kofi Kingston, the Big Show, Chris Jericho, and of course, Hornswoggle (who is simply the best little person in the wrestling business today, bar none).  I would have liked to see more of Maryse and The Miz, but an interview will have to suffice for now.  These days, every episode of Raw has a guest host, although I wasn’t excited to have ZZ Top as the hosts for the night.  The host the previous week was Seth Green (excellent) and next week it’s supposed to be Shaquille O’Neil (righteous).

In addition to the chair shots and pyrotechnics, I purchased my own John Cena shirt, so if you need an attitude adjustment, just let me know and I’ll put on the necessary attire and go to work.  I can’t believe I know as much about this as I do.  I found myself explaining story lines to some of my buddies as if this was common knowledge.  Maybe I should read a book or something on Monday nights for a while.

If you’ve ever been to my house and walked out the back door, you’ve probably noticed the horrible, squealing sliding glass door.  I mean, it’s not as bad as Steve’s grill, but I can assure you, it’s not something you want to be near.  On Thursday, we had some contractors from Home Depot come out and install two French doors with little mini-blinds inside the glass.  We also had a retractable screen installed that meets in the middle and is secured by a strong magnet.

The door man and his wife showed up around 9:00 in the morning and didn’t leave until 5:30 that night.  There’s no way I can do anything around my house.  I had to pay to have someone put in my doors, I paid to have a plumber install a new toilet, and I paid to have people paint rooms in my house.  I can change light bulbs and air filters if there are adequate instruction manuals.  Sometimes, if I’m lucky, my dad will come over and help me install lights or shelves or something like that.  When I say help, I mean I hand him them tools he needs.

And on top of not being able to do these things, I just don’t like this sort of work.  Whatever I do, I can find imperfections galore.  The door is no different.  Did you know that it was necessary for us to paint our door?  This seems ridiculous.  Apparently the paint creates a seal or something that keeps moisture from getting inside and ruining everything.  Me being me, I asked if I could pay some extra money to have someone paint it, but they said no.  So it was up to Kristin and me.  So we taped and primed and painted.  Kristin did a good job, but the whole thing just stressed me out.  And sure enough, I can see several places at the bottom that I messed up.  I guess it’s not so bad since we can retouch it, but damn it, this kind of stuff makes my head hurt.  When I buy a door, I want it to be fully functional.  I don’t need a little project.  I need a door, a door that works perfectly and that I never think about ever again.

I’ll probably retouch it this weekend.  Sigh.

Update - there's a freaking leak under my door.  Are all doors suppose to leak or is it just my stupid one?

A day or two ago, Dan’s trusty site, Asking for Thirds, went down for about a day and a half.  As maintenance crews worked around the clock to fix this problem, I had to cope with not being able to make my daily post.  It was maddening to me and to the millions of readers who probably read this blog.  I don’t want to overstate the importance of the world getting their daily dose of Ed, but ask yourself, just what exactly happened to the economy during these 36 hours of terror?

I’m enjoying saying something daily, regardless of who reads it, and it was tough to take a day’s break.  Thanks to Dan for getting the site back up and running, but it raised a question.  Dan mentioned that I could put my valuable musings somewhere else, and wouldn’t be susceptible to his server going down.  I hear BlogSpot is affiliated with Google in some way, so with my Gmail account I already have a reason to look at that.  With BlogSpot, or Blogger, I’m not sure of the name, I could easily post and occasionally add a picture of me flexing or something.  There are different colors as well, so I would say it is family friendly.

The only problem is that I would need to come up with a cool name for my new blog.  That’s a tough call, since I want something either dumb or witty, and I don’t want to go with the same old name.  I mean, I used to be Ed’s Sports Heap.  If anyone has a good idea for a name, please let me know.  I plan on stewing over this for a few days.

The other option is to continue on AFT.  Dan mentioned that he may shut down and retool and reopen to rave reviews.  I’d be down with that, although I suggested that he change the format to something edgier like “Scandals and Animals.”  That would be nice. 

I hope I keep this up during the school year.  I’ve enjoyed posting this summer more than I have I a long time, and I’d like to continue.  With a month left in my summer, I know I’ll be good until then, and maybe I could make a habit of using a few minutes of my planning to post, but I know that probably won’t happen with the same regularity.  I’d like to try it, so we’ll see what happens in the fall.  I think I could do it.

Today I’m at home watching two people from Home Depot install a new door in my house.  Since I’m at home, I’ve decided to do something productive instead of just drink and play my PlayStation 3 all day long.  The closets in my office are scary.  Literally stacked five feet high with an assortment of little gems and a lot of crap, this is a task I have had on my mental to-do list for years.

 

So I start going through everything, throwing out old wrapping paper, a box of old VHS cassettes, my magic eight ball, a breast pump.  What the hell?  A breast pump?  I emailed Kristin and she totally played it off as “Oh, I was just holding this for my sister.”  Yeah – isn’t this the same thing little hoppers in The Wire say when the police pinch them for drugs?  Anyway, there are a lot of worthless things I’m holding onto that is just taking up a lot of space in my tiny house.

 

Load after load is taken to the trash, but I keep finding little items that make me smile and reflect back on various moments in my life.  I found a couple of Sports Illustrateds from the early 1980s with Larry Bird on cover.  I located my schedules from my trips to both Chicago and Seattle, I saw a great newspaper clipping from the Daily Tar Heel about how older siblings help their younger brothers and sisters adapt to life in college.  I’m quoted in it, talking about helping out my brother.  I found a card Kristin gave me on my first day of teaching, and I found the program for Kristin’s mom’s funeral.  I still have a copy of our wedding program, and a whole stack of tickets stubs from various events – Memphis Music Festivals, tickets to a Red Sox game, Summer Slam, and a pile of college basketball games.  There are photos from my coaching days and various trips I’ve taken.

 

Obviously, these are items to keep.  Not the breast pump, stupid, the other stuff.  And it might be nice to skim through these things from time to time.  I’m glad I have them.  They make me happy.  My question is can a guy make a scrapbook or should my scrapbook be the box into which I stuffed everything?  A scrapbook seems like an undertaking – I’m not talking about bubble writing and hearts everywhere.  I’m just talking about a photo album where I threw everything in a testosterone-filled trip down memory lane.

I just read an outstanding headline – “A Steroids Arcade Game to Become Universal Movie.”  I didn’t know there was a steroids arcade game, but it stands to reason.  There are games like Grand Theft Auto where you steal cars and shoot people, and there are sports games galore, so why not fuse them together?  It’s a hybrid, a crossover, and depending on the game controls and graphics, could be a great rental.  And being a crossover game, it could reach a very large audience, kids and adults,  alike.

I imagine there are already players in the game that you can use like Bonds, McGwire, Rodriguez, and Clemens.  But the career mode would be what I’m looking for, complete with a create-a-player mode that you could inject with different drugs.  Your play would be altered and you could finally make a Major League roster, or depending on your ability, just crack into the show.  Now, it probably isn’t just about jacking homeruns.  There would have to be a avoiding the media mini game or at least drug tests to cheat or buy your way through.  Maybe there’s a timed race where you could have to steal a car and drive it to the edge of town where you can purchase clean urine.  Then back to the stadium for a little batting practice.

And what about the message this game, and subsequent movie, sends to our nation’s youth?  If you’re not cheating, you’re not winning.  To be the best, you have to be willing to do what the other guy won’t.  Nice guys finish last.  Yay capitalism!  Let’s go make some money, and let’s try to do it in a questionable way.  I’m a huge fan of this idea.  Somebody is certainly earning their paycheck on this idea alone.

Update – I’m so disappointed.  I read the headline wrong.  It’s “Asteroids Arcade Game to Become Universal Movie.”  That’s going to suck.  Hard.

Kristin and I went to see the new Johnny Depp movie, Public Enemies, on Friday night.  I was really excited to see this, being that it had Johnny Depp in it, and that it dealt with the life of John Dillinger.  Dillinger was a famous bank robber chased by the FBI back in the 1930s, and that era of gangsters is fascinating.  I was hoping for something along the lines of Bonnie and Clyde.  Let me give you my review – crap!  Not good in the slightest.  Oh, and a total waste of time.

It was two hours and twenty minutes of seemingly random events spliced together.  I would like to congratulate the director for being able to leave out all character development so I didn’t care about any of the people.  Notice I didn’t say like the characters, but care about them.  It was one of few movies I’ve been to where I was constantly checking the time to see when I could leave.  Dillinger goes to prison twice during the movie, and spends about 3 minutes of movie time there.  He escapes twice – no need for a director to lead up to an escape or let you know how Dillinger was able to procure a fake gun to trick the guards.  And that was the crime – this could have been a great scene – in real life, John Dillinger allegedly whittled a block of wood down to look exactly like a handgun and then painted it black with shoe polish.  That would be great!  But was this in the movie?  No, unless you count showing Depp discarding a gun that a guard says is fake as he rambles out the prison.  I think I watched the movie like Kristin must watch Star Wars movies – thinking it’s all just meaningless people in costumes shooting at each other. 

The next night, we searched to cleanse our palates, so we went for a change of pace and watched The Aristocrats, and short documentary that features about a hundred comics telling the same dirty joke in different ways.  What makes the joke different is the way they work in the crudest, most vile phrases and actions you could imagine with all members of a family auditioning for a talent scout.  Definitely not for prudish types, it was a riot.  It made me gain a respect for people like Gilbert Gottfried and Bob Saget –there is comic genius in both of them.  If you’re looking for different way to spend an afternoon or evening, and you want to desensitize yourself to extreme vulgarity, give it a shot.  It was unforgettable.

I enjoy the All-Star game.  For as long as I can remember, the midsummer classic has been a part of my summer.  While I’m not old enough to remember Pete Rose destroying Ray Fosse, I do recall such moments as Bo Jackson and Wade Boggs leading off the 1989 game with back to back homers, and the 1994 game which featured Fred McGriff tying it up with a home run in the bottom of the ninth.  Although it hasn’t happened in over a decade, I still always pull for the National League to win.

Back then, the game was strictly an exhibition, and I still watched it for bragging rights.  I knew the Senior Circuit was the stronger league, and this game solidified my belief.  Home field advantage in the World Series wasn’t at stake yet, but I still tuned in every July.  In fact, even with the National League’s current winning drought, I still think they are the stronger league.  I know most people now have come out against this one game determining home field advantage, and I agree.  Fifty-six percent of World Series has been won by the league with home field advantage so this is flawed logic.  My suggestion for how to decide which league gets this advantage is to award it to the league with the best record in interleague games.  I think that would work and it would give the stronger league a reward for winning more games.

The other key conversation that always happens around the All-Star game is people discussing who made the team that shouldn’t have and who was snubbed.  This year is no different with some talking heads arguing that Ian Kinsler should beat out Dustin Pedroia or that Justin Morneau deserves the start over Mark Teixeira.  It’s always a fun discussion, but the fans do vote for who they want to see as the starters.  And that comes with big market teams having a heavy representation in the game.  There are more deserving players that probably should, by the numbers, get a chance to start or at least make the team.  But there’s a part of me that says if fans really want to see someone make the team, so be it.  I figure if Pablo Sandoval and Jason Bartlett keep performing for a couple more years, they will be able to replace David Wright and Derek Jeter.  But those things take time, and in the meantime, we’ll give the fans what they want.

My biggest problem, which isn’t that bad I guess, is that the fans have voted in both Carlos Beltran and Josh Hamilton, and both have spent most of the season in the disabled list.  But then again, fans get some things right too.  As you watch this year’s game, you will not see either Alex Rodriguez or Manny Ramirez – the performance enhancing scandals do obviously make a difference to many fans.  And I’m not saying All-Star Raul Ibanez is juicing, but here are some interesting stats: his lifetime batting average is .287 – this year’s average is.312, his lifetime slugging percentage is .481 – this year it has jumped to .656, and his on-base plus slugging has been .829 over his career, but has now ballooned to 1.027 for the first half of this year.  Not bad for a player who has just celebrated their 37 birthday.

As far as the starters, I’m hoping for Zack Greinke to start for the American League and Tim Lincecum for the National League (even though he’s a Giant). 

Eleven percent of people in North Carolina are unemployed.  If this hasn’t impacted you personally, it probably has for at least one of your friends or family.  While my job is safe for now, others that I work with have not been as fortunate.  Good friends of mine, both teachers and assistants, who are skilled educators, have lost their jobs.  And while that fact is both sad and stressful, the real problem lies in the fact that with every job taken away from education, North Carolina’s students suffer. 

For the upcoming year, again more students will be packed into teacher’s classrooms, reducing the amount of time teachers can spend with each student.  For those children diagnosed with learning disabilities, the loss of assistants in the classroom mean that they will not have the support of an extra adult to help them when they have trouble.  I know I will be expected to take on this job with my students, and I shall smile and do my best, but it’s a simple numbers game.  Two adults can help a class of thirty kids better than one – at least two skilled and dedicated adults can.  Whether it is breaking down the class into smaller groups or pulling out a small handful of students that need a little more time on a topic while I engage the other students, this extra body supports learning.  Or should I say supported learning? 

With the state’s economic woes, there is a need to cut spending and increase revenues.  Governor Perdue has proposed a one cent tax hike that would expire after September 2010.  She is also proposing increasing taxes on single people that earn over $500,000 or couples that make over a million dollars annually.  She suggests taxes on cigarettes and alcohol, as well as on such luxuries as cosmetic surgeries and, chartered flights, and limousines.  Personally, I don’t mind paying more for my alcohol, and my purchases alone would help.  Also, rich people should help our most needy families.  I’m pretty sure if you make half a million every year, you’re not having trouble paying the rent.  These folks can suck it up.  Get over it.  Taxes are an important part of providing for the people of the state.

And as far as the cuts?  With fewer educators, can we assume that our children will receive less education?  This is a problem that won’t haunt us for a year or two, but rather for a generation.  What is important to us?  Wasn’t the education lottery supposed to help?  Now I’m beginning to ponder how these job losses will change my teaching strategies and effectiveness.  How many times will I be able to call on a kid every day?  Once? Twice if I’m lucky? 

We’re a state that supposedly values education, but we always rank near the bottom.  I guess one way of looking at this is that when you’re close to last in education, you can’t fall too far.  I hope.

Big news!  Last night, my new laptop arrived!  It’s a tiny little netbook with a 10 inch screen.  Kristin and I have talked about getting a laptop for our personal use around Christmas, but we moved the date up when I found out about these little things.  It is an ASUS Eee PC, whatever that means, and it has just about everything I will want on it by simply having internet capability. 

There is a little getting used to the smaller keyboard, but it actually doesn’t seem to slow me up too much since I rarely use all ten fingers when I type.  I’m more of a six digit puncher.  There is a trial version of Microsoft Office on there and I think I will eventually have to get that or my friend Steve says there is a free version called “Open Office” that I can download.  I don’t know a lot about that, but I’m all for it if it is compatible with Microsoft Word and Excel.  After all it sounds like the price is right!

Speaking of price, my main man, Dan, held my hand while I purchased it, which is to say he got on a laptop, clicked around a while, and told me what I wanted.  All I did was punch in my credit card information and sit back and wait.  I had to wait a week or so for it to deliver, but that was fine because he found me a pretty decent deal.  After rebate, it will wind up costing me $279.

Aside – Me thinks rebates are like insurance companies.  They can’t just stick a piece of paper in with the laptop and tell me to mail it in – they have to force me to get online, enter in offer codes and valuable information and then print out some stupid, special rebate form.  After I mail it in, I get my $30 rebate in just 8-10 weeks.  Rebates, like insurance companies, try to frustrate you with crappy forms and procedures in order to make you give up the fight and just accept losing money.  I’ll admit this is the first rebate form I have ever attempted to complete and I’m not sure yet if I’ll finish the process.

If this tiny laptop thing goes well, I want to totally get rid of my big, ancient desktop.  That could free up some space in my tiny house.  I’ll move to do this if I can move my wireless transmitter to my living room to get a stronger signal, and possibly if I can figure a way to hook my new toy up to my printer, which I think could be difficult.  Moving my wireless thingy could allow me to use my PlayStation 3 to download demos quicker and possibly play games against real people online.  That could be cool.

It’s decision making time.  I have a dilemma and it’s not going to be an easy decision to make.  For my next PlayStation 3 game, should I purchase NCAA Football 10 or Fight Night Round 4?  It’s a choice that I have given considerable thought and I’m not quite sure which way to go.  I’ve done my research, from reading reviews online and even downloading a playable demo of each game so I think I’m prepared, yet I’m not quite ready to pull the trigger.  I’m hoping this will help me make my decision.

For NCAA Football 10, it’s a new version of an old favorite.  I’m not a huge football fan, but that’s never stopped me from playing several versions of this game.  As far as sports games go, football translates extremely well to video games – great graphics and that fact that each play starts from scrimmage means everything resets on every play which I think helps keep players from doing weird things that might happen in a basketball or soccer game where the action might go up and down the field for a few minutes before restarting.  I don’t know if that makes sense, but the point is I think it looks and plays very well.

It’s also proven to be a game I will spend a lot of time playing – games can be played in 35 minutes or so and I like going through the seasons and building dynasties through recruiting, and trying to win the Heisman with a created player.  But the downside is that it is a new version of an old favorite.  I bet there isn’t going to be a ton of new things, so it might just be like playing an older version so why buy it?  I mean, I don’t have it yet on the PS3, but it won’t be a new experience.

On the other hand, Fight Night Round 4 is sure to be a new experience.  It’s a boxing game that has such boxers as Mike Tyson, Muhammad Ali, and George Foreman.  I think there is something close to 50 boxers in the game, and there is a career mode/create a player version that allows you to scan your face and make you as a boxer which could be pretty sweet.    I could see someone knocking me out and seeing my face getting contorted and bloody.  There are different weight classes and the controls take some getting used to – all the punching is done by moving the right joystick.  If you play the demo a lot, as I have, it can really start to hurt your thumb. 

I have played the demo many times and have learned that it is difficult to knock someone out, but that seems reasonable to me.  There are two boxers to choose from in the demo and I have only knocked someone down five times. 

Since I’ve played the demo a lot and am still interested, it stands to reason that I would enjoy the game.  It’s a tough decision to make because games are expensive and I don’t want to have buyer’s remorse.  When I buy a game, it is with the intent to play it a lot over many months.  Does Fight Night offer that, or should I rely on my old comfort with college football season gearing up in a couple months?  I just don’t know.

I have cool socks.  They are a trophy for running in Carrboro’s Four on the Fourth – a four mile run through shady and mostly flat neighborhoods.  I was expecting a shirt, but cool red, white and blue socks fill me with a patriotic spirit.  There were some people there with socks from previous year’s runs, but I tried to stay focused so they wouldn’t intimidate me.

It was cool for July with relatively low humidity – just about as perfect a day as one could request.  I am proud that ever since my last day with students – June 10th – I have only missed running five days.  Those days were three days of basketball camp and two days to attend a wedding in Asheville.  Every other day, including weekends and holidays, I have run.  And to ready myself, I had tried to run not only on the elliptical machines, but also on the treadmills at the gym.  Last weekend, I did a test run on the tobacco trail near my house.  I was able to go the whole four miles without stopping.

We started out and everyone seemed to be moving at a very fast pace, so I allowed myself to slow down a bit.  I started out too fast my last race and almost couldn’t finish, so I wanted to pace myself.  My goal was to finish in less than forty minutes, which would be a ten minute mile.  I ended up finishing #300 with a time of 35 minutes and 21 second, which is under a nine minute mile.  I was quite happy with that, and it was exciting to finish on a track like marathoners do in the Olympics. 

On my last run, a 5K, I estimate I ran it in about 28 minutes.  This means, I think, that my average time per mile was actually faster for this one.  This is easily the longest distance I’ve run outside since the days of high school soccer practice.  And it’s making me think about the possibility of trying a longer race.  If I’m completely awesome, and I have a strong feeling that I am, I could run in a 10K in Carrboro on October 3rd and finish up the day with a strong showing at the World’s Beer Festival in Durham.  Now that would be a day for Ed’s history book!

I used to think I knew the rules for what happens to you if you go back in time and meet yourself.  Disaster, right?  The Back to the Future movies taught me all I ever needed to know about what happens if you go back in time.  Now it’s in my head so please sing this line – “Take me away, I don’t mind, you better promise me I’ll be back in time.”

OK, we’re was I?  Oh yes.  Marty McFly and Doc Brown taught me that if I ever go back in time and meet myself, to be very careful that I don’t change the course of history, lest I want my brother’s picture to dissolve.  This makes sense.  If I grew up to be the President of the United States, got in my CIA time machine, and went back to see myself when I was 16, I could change everything.  If I said to my younger, impressionable self, “Edward, trust me.  A lot of being the president is sitting in meetings.”  Ugh.  Right there, young Edward might have decided to change his aspirations and become a vet.  And what would happen to old Edward?  I guess I’d disappear because now President Barnes never existed.

The recent Star Trek movie changes this simple truth.  In the movie, old Spock meets young Spock, they speak, and there are no problems.  Young Spock is about to go on adventures for years.  I would think that meeting oneself would change the way one views life.  Is it a given that you will live to become old Spock?  I doubt it.  If an older Ed came to see me, isn’t it possible that I would assume that I would grow to be 96 at least, so maybe I could rob a bank or try to catch a bullet with my teeth?  And then I would die, and old Ed would die too, right?  According to Star Trek, I’m not so sure.  But I can’t help but wonder what will happen if young Spock looks at old Spock, thinks to himself, “That old man looks like he’s been through hell - instead of going into space, I’m going to open a little boutique.”  I don’t know what his life would be like, but I bet he’d end up living long and prospering.

Listening to Mike & Mike this morning, I heard them interviewing some MLE members.  MLE, or Major League Eating, has members competing in the Nathan’s Hot Dog Eating Contest on the Fourth.  These guys are hilarious, and the eating competitions are pretty much unwatchable.  It  hurts my stomach to see these people push down dozens of hot dogs in ten minutes.  There’s a rule about being disqualified if you vomit, which I think they refer to as “refunding.”

Joey Chestnut, the reigning hot dog champion, said that around Thursday he switches to a liquid diet so that he will be completely empty on Saturday.  He’s looking to down 66 hot dogs in ten minutes, which is less than a hot dog every ten seconds. 

Another eater, I missed his name, referred to Joey Chestnut’s class of eaters (think recruiting class) was so strong; they were named the four horsemen of the esophagus.  Simply awesome.  Anyway, he went on to say that his specialty wasn’t hot dogs, but rather any debris food.  When questioned on this, he replied that this is any food that leaves a bone or a shell, something like that.  Love the terminology.

And, looking at their website, I learned another great term – bunnettes.  See definition below.  Again, from the website, “When little girls dream, they dream of one day becoming a Bunnette.”

Bunnette (bunet) n.

1. (Trad.) A person, usu. female, who counts the amount of food eaten by competitors in Major League Eating events.

2. A woman, usu. seductive by disposition, who is passionate about the sport of competitive eating and its practitioners.

 

Last Saturday, Kristin and I were grocery shopping at the new Harris Teeter near our house.  Usually we go together – it makes a mundane task more fun.  My only rule is that I get tired of starting on the right-hand side of the store, so I make us go against traffic and start on the far side of the store.  Oh, and I hate to go back to get something we forgot on the list, so I grade Kristin on how well she does.  I mean, we have a list, so why would there ever be a need to go back.  It’s just inefficient.

Anyway, among other things, we bought some ground beef for tacos and a pork tenderloin.  Apparently these were placed in their own little bag at checkout because we paid for them and promptly left them there.  We realized this the next day, and Kristin lamented the loss of money while I lamented the loss of pork.

After work, Kristin returned to Harris Teeter and told them the story.  One of the baggers that knows us remembered us leaving out precious food.  The workers told Kristin to go back and get some ground beef and a pork tenderloin – no charge!  And he made a point of telling her to not worry about getting the exact same size – just to get one that she liked. 

It was that easy.  Just in-and-out – no problems!  I don’t know if all grocery stores are like this, but it’s not that surprising that Harris Teeter would have awesome customer service.  This type of service impresses me.  Sure, we pay a little more at Harris Teeter, but it examples like this that keep us coming back.

On a related subject, why do we always leave the most desirable items at the grocery store?  Beer, meat, chips – these things get left.  But salt, napkins, toilet bowl cleaner – yeah we’ll have them when we get home every time.

I don’t want to have a phone at my house anymore.  Is there a need?  Everyone in the world, including Harper, has a mobile phone, so what’s the need?  Nobody calls my home phone except for telemarketers and people looking for donations to a dozen different causes.  All this phone gives me is a way to be interrupted at dinner.

I pay over $50 a month to be annoyed almost daily.  Kristin says we need this phone in case someone attacks us and we have to call 911.  I guess this is a legitimate thought, but can’t we call from our other phones?  And if someone really wanted to attack us, I guess they could cut the phone lines before attacking us anyway.

OK, that’s a little morbid.  Sorry.  $50 a month could pay for a lot of something.  That adds up.  Is there another need for this service, or is this just something that’s outdated?  I don’t bundle this with other services either, so I could really cut it and never think twice about it.  Most people I know have a home phone number, so I’m either missing something or we’re all just doing this because we used to have to do this to be able to communicate.  What am I missing?

I like my summer schedule.  They let me come and go as I please so I’ve decided to run in the mornings and get to work by 9:00.  So far, I’ve worked five days and run all five of these days.  I’m running between 45-50 minutes on the elliptical machines at the (still-in-business) Peak Fitness.  I’d like to run at least every day I work this summer, but I also think I may try to include the weekends in my schedule.

Next Saturday, on the 4th of July, there is a 4 mile run through scenic Carrboro at 8:00am.  Four miles seems like a lot.  I trained a lot for the 5K last fall and I almost died at the end, and this is longer than that.  Cardiovascularly speaking, I think I have the lungs for it, but my question is do I have the body?  Asphalt is an unforgiving running medium and I’m no featherweight. 

I’m strongly considering trying this run, but I’m testing the waters at the gym.  Elliptical running is nice, but there’s very little impact.  So, for the last two days, I’m started on the elliptical and then moved over to run a mile or two on a regular treadmill.  My knees are OK so far; however my hips are sore now.  That’s one of two things: either I have no business running or this is kind of like sore muscles when you start to lift weights.  I’m going to try this for a couple more days before I make my decision. 

I don’t mind going slow – maybe a 10 minute mile or something like that, but I don’t want to walk, finish dead last, or dead for that matter. 

On Saturday, I went to my first Catholic wedding.  It was in Asheville in some big church.  I don’t know if you’ve attended a wedding using the Catholic traditions, but I found out that they are long, there is various sitting, standing, and kneeling, and you get to drink real wine.  By long, I mean over an hour, which wasn’t too bad, considering we broke it up by the sitting and standing and singing.  Unfortunately, Kristin didn’t let me go up and drink wine, since it was communion and something about my lack of faith or something.  And, I rationalize, that it probably was some scuppernong wine anyway.  Besides, now that I think about it, everyone was drinking out of the same cup – that’s got to be some sort of health code violation. 

I was looking good for the wedding.  Kristin took me to play dress-up the week before so I could find something new to wear, and we decided on a seersucker jacket.  I didn’t know what seersucker was, but I have to admit, I’m a fan.  Light blue and white stripes are fun to wear, and it is a really light material.  I didn’t even mind wearing a jacket.  I went sans tie, but I still looked respectable.  I like the seersucker because it’s different.  Oh, there’s a wedding?  I guess I’ll pull out my pants, white shirt, tie, and blue jacket.  Seersucker really throws something different into the equation.  I can see myself trying to work this jacket into more social events in the fall.

Speaking of dressing up, I don’t think people know how to dress for weddings.  Many people there had on a tie or a jacket or even a collared golf shirt, but seriously, you should have seen choices for some of these people.  I saw short pants and t-shirts during the ceremony.  And some of the guest that went to take communion had on a collared shirt, but they had it untucked and hanging down to their knees.  Not everyone can but a new outfit on a whim, but at least tuck in your shirt for the hour.  My nephew went to my wedding and he wasn’t much more than a toddler and he had on a tie (albeit only for a few minutes).  Is this that big a deal?

The reception was awesome.  The card said adult reception, which either meant no kids or there’s going to be swinging going on.  Thankfully it was the former, and I had a great, childless time.  The bride and groom, both teacher friends of mine, had me introduce the wedding party in my own festive way.  Lots of teachers were there so I knew people and didn’t have to set at a table of miscellaneous people from different social circles.  All in all, it was a nice time.

With my summer job, I gain an extra forty minutes of time due to not driving all the way to Alamance County.  Usually I’m on the road for about thirty minutes each way during the school year.  Now, I’m rocking about a ten minute drive to my cushy summer job.  It’s like an extra Mini-Daylight Savings Time, just for me!  My long commute never really bothers me, but now I have all this extra time.  And I’m sure my car thanks me too.  I’m hoping the two of us are making that trip together for many years to come.

Now I’m thinking about the differences in the distance traveled and how that relates to my wallet.  Do you know how much cheaper gas is for me?  Hang on; let me do some quick math.

(click, click, whirring sound, click, click, sigh, click, grunt, whir, hmmm)

OK, during the school year I drive about 60 miles to school and back.  Compare that to the 14 miles I travel in the summer.  Let’s conservatively estimate 45 miles to the gallon (sometimes higher, sometimes lower), allowing me roughly 594 miles for each tank of gas.  I just filled up my 13.2 gallon tank for $2.65, meaning I paid $34.98 for a complete fill-up. 

With other trips factored in during the weekends and what-have-you, most times I have to fill up about every eight days or so during the year.  And, just for fun, if I only took the hybrid to work and back during the summer, I might be able to go seven-eight weeks between filling up.  Obviously that wouldn’t happen; but I do think I could go at least three weeks between trips to the gas station.  That’s like an extra $70 every three weeks.  So I’ve got that going for me.

I don’t know if that math is right.  Honestly, my head hurts now.  I’m going to go spend all my newly calculated money.

I don’t like Twitter.  It seems annoying to me.  I don’t really see the point.  It’s short, kind of like text messages.  Um, OK.  I can’t see me taking the time to read Kobe Bryant’s tweet about him scoring 40 points, finding out that some random dude thought a lady at Starbucks had a sweet ass,  or updating myself in 140 characters or less on what the weather’s like outside.  Does this sound too grumpy?

My buddy Dan tells me it’s easier to Twitter than blog or update a website – I guess.  It doesn’t seem to be that hard to do this.  He used the example that if I went to the Durham Bulls website, they could easily tweet that a game had been canceled due to raining frogs or something.  This seems like something I could find out on the radio, tv, website, or by simply stepping outside. 

I suppose that in an emergency like when Sully landed that plane in the river, or maybe when Iranians are upset at their election results, they could tweet about it.  But couldn’t this be done by a website or blog?  Maybe it couldn’t.  I’m not sure about the advantages and disadvantages or this so I’m asking for an education.  What is the big deal?

Maybe I’m just a technophobe.  Am I?  I don’t really like the idea of Myspace or Facebook either.  Actually, I’m not that sure that email is going to make it either not that I think about it. 

You may have noticed that I do not update my web log anymore. I feel like this blog has run its course. Although, this does not mean that you have lost your ability to keep track of everything Steve. Enter Twitter. I know, I know. Thats the new service all the kids are talking about so that egotistical folks can tell their mundane bits of information to the world. I'm not saying that doesn't happen, but don't judge the service based on the poor Twittering of a few. You wouldn't ignore email simply because people use it to send spam, right? Same thing applies here. Twitter has been a fun endeavor for me and I hope that you can use it too. Follow me here: http://twitter.com/unceman

I’m a winner.  I think that much is clear.

 

But one can’t rest on his laurels forever.  It was getting about time for me to prove my worth once more to my adoring masses.  And I needed to do it in style.

 

I decided to make my presence felt through Kristin’s office March Madness Crazy Brackets Tournament.  Entry is $10 per person, per bracket.  I have long lobbied against a payout system that rewards the second and third place finishers.  I’m a firm believer in a winner-take-all style of bracket challenges.  It closely mimics life and the real tournament for that matter.  In the real tournament, UNC and Michigan won’t win.  UNC will win and Michigan State will get a firm handshake and a slap on the back.  That’s what Kristin’s tournament runner-up should get.

 

Fortunately, she decided to go with a winner-take-most version, with the winner receiving all money except for a measly $10 that would be returned to the person with the worst score as kind of a joke.  Looking through my bracket, I knew I had selected the enough winning teams to take the cash by my clearly superior basketball intellect.  Sure, I dropped a few games to keep interest and hope alive for the others, much like a cat might do to a mouse.  But in the end, I wrapped everything up before the Final Four was played.

 

But to really show my awesomeness, I entered a second bracket with the intention of losing so I could snag that $10 too.  And I pulled that off too.  It’s like a perfect game – no cash for anyone else!  Ed gets $170, everyone else gets $0.  Yay!

 

I love it when a plan comes together.

“Your fifties you have a minor surgery. You'll call it a procedure, but it's a surgery.”

 

I had my hernia surgery on Wednesday of this week.  All in all, it went pretty smoothly.  I had explained to Kristin that the doctor had urged me to eat a lot of bacon the night before, so she took care of that essential need.  I couldn’t eat after midnight, which was unpleasant.  I didn’t really have a lot of time to make myself nervous about it, since it didn’t become official that I was having it this week until the day before.  I had been nursing a sore throat and the doctor said if it was too bad, then I needed to postpone the surgery.  Luckily for me, when I called on Thursday, she said for me to come on in.

 

I’ve never been cut up before, and I was amazed at the lack of progress made on those little gowns that expose your butt.  I would have figured it was all awesome and from the future.  One woman took my temperature by holding something up to my head and just pressing a button.  That was pretty cool.  One of the doctors came in and marked on me to confirm they were cutting the correct side and then they wheeled me in to some room with a bunch of people in it.  For my part, I went to sleep and woke up a couple hours later, sore and shivering.

 

I have often wondered how my tolerance for pain measures up with others.  Sometimes I think I have the tolerance of a show poodle and other times I think of myself as very much like that guy from Unbreakable.  Kristin said she thought I had slightly better tolerance for pain than most people.  I guess that’s OK.  My lower abdomen in very sore and it feels exactly what a c-section must feel like.  I never knew how much movement center in your abdomen.  Getting up out of bed, putting on socks, tying shoes, opening drawers, etc – all hurt.

 

I have gotten out of cleaning up after dinner and taking out the trash, but I feel like I want to be back to normal.  It seems like a long time ago that I ran in that 5K or worked out at all.  Hopefully in a month, I will be lifting a little and running a lot.  I have medicine for pain – percocet – but I’m only trying to take that at night because it makes me feel weird.  I’m basically on 600 mg of ibuprofen and that it.  It’s now Friday and I am starting to feel a little more like myself, although I think I’m going to school in sweatpants on Monday.

 

I spent last year working on my National Boards.  It is a rather involved process, with me having to create four different entries that explore several of my students as they grow into better readers and writers, including entries that involve videotaping a whole class discussion and a class working in small groups.  Finally, I had to create an accomplishments entry that showcased different valuable nuggets I imparted upon my learning community.  I also had to take six thirty-minute timed assessments over at NC Central.

 

Anyway, my scores came back and I passed.  Yay!  I thought I should pass – I mean, jeez, someone has to pass and I seem to have my act together.  I needed 275 total points to pass and I got 294.  That sounds pretty good, but some of my scores were below average – I don’t like to think much about that part and am going to try to figure out what I did.  I know a couple other teaching buddies that got their scores back and they didn’t make it.  I think I was aided by being able to go to NCCAT (North Carolina Center for the Advancement of Teaching) last October and they really got me on the right track.  The instructions for how to do it are about 300 pages and before going to NCCAT, I just looked at it and became overwhelmed and walked away.  I wonder if I would have made it on my first try without a little free expertise being thrown my way.

 

Being an English teacher, I think I am a better writer than some, but not necessarily a better teacher.  I’ve talked to several teachers that I think are incredible and they have missed the cut on the first try.  The state of North Carolina pays for teachers to do it the first time, but the second time is out of the teacher’s pocket (I think).  And I can’t quite remember, but I want to say it costs something like $2,500.  Yuck.  A lot of teachers told me that I would work something like 300 hours on this.  Wrong.  I think people try to make things sound tougher than they are.  I probably worked something like 100-130 hours and it was stressful, but totally doable if you are one who can set a schedule and stick to it. 

 

My certification lasts for ten years and after that, I’ll have to redo it so it will last for another ten years.  I hear getting it again is harder so I have that to look forward to.  So what does this get me?  Money.  I think I’ll get something like 12% more money over the next ten years, so that’s nice.  And I get a fancy certificate.  Yay again.  Sometimes I think about getting my masters, but then I think that it would be nice to just take some time for Kristin and me to enjoy each other’s company.  Besides, a masters is nice and would pay more money, but is it worth the cost of getting the degree?  For now, I say no. 

I voted today.  Yay me.  I wanted to wait until November 4th because it’s more fun to go with the big crowd on the big day, but I know the polling places are going to be crazy all day and I have to be at school.  So I’m done.  I met a lady out front at one of the early voting spots at Southwest Elementary School who said if I bought an Obama yard sign, I could get a free magic carpet ride.  She was laughing and standing on a carpet, but my thoughts verged on dirty.  Never mind…

 

Looking back over the last few months, I’ve done my part to help turn North Carolina blue for the first time since Jimmy Carter won back in 1976.  I have convinced one of my conservative teacher friends to back Obama and I have convinced members of my family to vote for Barack.  Taking the advice of another colleague, I have offered to have some other family members stay at home on the fourth.  Maybe that’s not the most democratic thing I’ve ever done, but there’s supposed to be good fishing that Tuesday.  I’m just saying…

 

It’s exciting to think that my vote may actually make a difference this year.  I was having a conversation with a fellow teacher from Michigan who was trying to complete an absentee ballot – I asked if she had considered voting here because we needed her vote more here.  She told me she wasn’t convinced Michigan was safe so she was sending her vote north.  Every little bit helps.

 

Bottom line is that I got a sticker.  And I’m going to wear my fancy sticker tomorrow at school.  I like stickers.  People should wear more stickers. 

I traveled to Ohio this weekend for a wedding.  I wanted to share some pictures I took with my phone.  I forgot to bring a real camera.

# -The happy couple.  Meet Mr. and Mrs. Pete Nadel.  (Krissy there in the white is my cousin)

#-The Minister's parking space at the church...

#-From an Arby's in Marietta, OH

#-Sorry for the poor picture quality, but that says $2.69 for unleaded.  Taken at the corner of Everhard and Whipple in North Canton, Ohio.

This weekend was peppered with interesting tidbits.  Enjoy.

 

On Friday, Kristin booked our trip to Blowing Rock.  We’re taking my mother for a little trip and my brother’s family is going as well.  It’s not quite New York City, but it should be fun to hang out, have some family time, shop, and maybe do a little light hiking.  We’re staying at the Chetola Resort (www.chetola.com) which looks a little like there might be a dirty dancing class there.  I’ll tell you more when I return, but that’s all I know right now.  I will say that having Kristin around makes shopping for my mother entirely enjoyable – it’s nice to have a lot of help.

 

On Saturday, Kristin and I enjoyed the Beer Festival after a one year hiatus.  This time it was held at the newer Durham Bulls Athletic Park and it was a nice experience.  I won’t say I encountered a ton of new beers, but I did enjoy some North Carolina beers that I had never heard of such as the Black Radish, straight from the Weeping Radish Brewery in Jarvisburg and another Foothills concoction, Sexual Chocolate.  Once again we enjoyed Sweetwater Beer and once again Kristin asked when their beer will be available around here.  “November.” the lady said, and I responded, “That’s what you always say!” and we kept moving.  There were a ton of Obama supporters there, but then again, duh – this is Durham.

 

Later, I watch my Dodgers finishing sweeping the Cubs and I’m proud to say I made it to the end of the game.  This was aided by a two hour nap beforehand, but still I would say that’s pretty impressive.  My predictions so far are pretty good – I picked the Dodgers, Phillies, Rays, and Angels (this may not be my best prediction).  Which brings me to Dan.  What type of new bet should we have?  As you may know, Dan and I have an annual bat as to which team will have the better record.  We always say that if our teams meet in the postseason, we will throw out the regular season bet and come up with something with much higher stakes.  I don’t know what that will be right now, but I’m open to suggestions.  And one of these teams will make it to the World Series, which will have three games played the three nights we are in Las Vegas.  Looks like someone is going to learn how to place sports bets…

 

And finally, on Sunday Kristin and I saw Bill Maher’s Religulous at the Galaxy in Cary.  I was his perfect demographic so don’t trust me, but it was awesome and scary.  He asks questions about many religions and visited creepy places like the Holy Land and the Creation Museum in Kentucky.  At the end, the audience clapped.  I always like that.

Election time is upon us.  Usually its a time for excitement, but my excitement is waning because I fear the worst possible scenario:  Four more years of Bush.

When I first heard that Barack Obama was running for president, I was energized.  He represented a more progressive, more contemporary approach than any other candidate we have seen in recent history.  With George W. Bush running the country into the ground over the past few years, I expected a backlash from the American voters eager to embrace a new direction for the country.  Obama seemed like the logical choice to lead that change. 

What happened to my optimism?  The American people seem to be accepting John McCain's vapid, bewildering and meandering campaign about nothing.  He seems to be willing to continue the destruction of this country that George W Bush has started.  Plus, by choosing the wholly unqualified Sarah Palin as a running mate, McCain should have disqualified himself from any serious contention to the Presidency.  However, we are amidst a tight race between Obama and McCain. 

Does an African-American scare you that much?  Or do you rely on Fox News and Rush Limbaugh for all of your political information?  Even a staunch Republican should realize that they are being sold a bunch of snake oil in the form of McCain/Palin.  The longer this race is close, the more chance we have of repeating the worst times of my adult life.  So I am preparing myself for *gulp* President McCain.  If you need me, I'll be in Canada.

I’m a little disappointed that the Mets didn’t win today so that we could have a National League playoff.  Since they lost to the Marlins and the CC Sabathia-led Brewers beat the Cubs, the Mets lost their playoff hopes on the last day of the season for the second straight season.  It seems to me that the Mets have taken over from the Red Sox for the suckiest team ever to challenge but come up painfully short.  Look for another eighty-eleven years of not winning out of the Mets, I guess. 

 

And speaking of CC Sabathia, I know this is known by everyone, but this guy is gonna get paid.  And paid well.  This guy should be the MVP of the National League – yep, I know.  He’s a pitcher.  There’s the Cy Young Award.  Yep, I know.  He only pitched in the N.L. for a couple months.  But would the Brewers be in playoffs without him?  What’s his ERA over his last 10 starts? (1.71)  How many complete games did he have?  (10)  And he could suck next year.  He’s in a contract year.  I’ve seen what Adrian Beltre could do in a contract year.  But he will bring in a record amount of money.  That’s 290 pounds of awesomeness.  I hear the Dodgers have a lot of money.  I’d love to see his big ass in Chavez Ravine.

 

And speaking of the Dodgers, they are one of the eight best teams in baseball.  They start their World Series run against the Cubbies on Wednesday.  So I should do some predicting or something.  Here goes.  Feel free to bet your house, car, or child on these results.  They’re gold!  Gold Jerry!

 

NL Divisional Series

Dodgers over the Cubs, 3-0

Phillies over the Brewers, 3-1

 

AL Divisional Series

*White Sox beat Twin in one game “playoff” Monday*

Rays over White Sox, 3-2 (Why not?)

Angels over Red Sox, 3-1

 

NLCS

Dodgers beat the Phillies, 4-3 (Manny is himself, Chad Billingsley arrives)

 

ALCS

Angels beat Rays, 4-1 (What did you expect?  A miracle?)

 

World Series

Angels beat the Dodgers, 4-2 (Ugh.  This ruins everything.  But I’m in Vegas to make some money off my team losing.)

 

You think I’m wrong?  I was wrong once back in 1990.  I can’t even remember the circumstances.  What do you think will happen?

Today was the big day, the sorority girl 5K!  Alpha Delta Pi’s tour around UNC’s campus was my motivation towards getting a gym membership and running and working out for the last couple months.  I had run on the elliptical machine.  I had drunk plenty of liquids.  Kristin had gotten up and cooked me a healthy breakfast.  Now, how would I fair?

 

I checked in before the race at the Old Well and slowly my running team showed up – Bobby, Harper, Dan, Erin, and Kristin’s boss from the pharmacy board – Jay.  We were stretching out and discussing our goals for the race.  Jay wanted to finish in 24 minutes, I wanted to be close to 25 minutes, and Bobby said he just didn’t want to die.  It was nice to have my friends with me today – it provided support and excited me about the run.

 

We started and there was quite the crowd – it looked like 1,000 runners to me.  I’m pretty sure I was the tallest runner there, so I had that going for me.  The first tenth of a mile was a tightly packed mass of people trying to run at their best pace while not tripping or elbowing others.  I had been running about a 7:30 mile on the elliptical machine and I tried to run at that pace on the road, although I had not actually run outside during my training.

 

The course was hilly – lots of ups and downs and I think those crafty girls tried to find a way to have us run uphill as much as possible.  We traveled around Gimghoul Circle the unfun way and then finished up by running uphill beside Kenan Stadium.  That was the toughest part for me.  There were less people there and I like the energy of a crowd and I was starting the last mile of the race.  Until now, my pace had been great – probably not too far off my goal, but my knees were beginning to ache and I was seeing several people walking. 

 

I did not want to start walking, no matter what, but it sounded so rewarding.  I began to think what that would say about my summer, my effort, my intensity, my will to win.  Not that I was winning – there were many, many people in front of me.  But ever since the pace had been set early on, I had passed more people than had passed me.  I started to run slower to conserve my energy, switching my primary goal from 25 minutes to running the entire race. 

 

We took the turn at the bell tower and I could smell the end.  “One foot in front of the other, one foot in front of the other” passed through my head, along with “elliptical machines do not do an adequate job of preparing 35 year olds for a run.”  I made the final turn and saw the finish line.  Only a total loser would stop now.  I remember past 5Ks years ago and how I always had a little extra juice in the tank.  But that was then.  I didn’t stop running the entire race, but it pushed me much, much harder than I thought it would.

 

Jay and Harper had already finished by the time I got there, and Jay told me he thought I finished strong and he guessed I was around 28:00 minutes.  If he’s right, I can live with that.  Dan, Bobby, and Erin finished shortly after that – we all were pleased with our efforts.  Then I left to ice down the old knees.  I’m quite proud of finishing without walking and am seriously considering another one in a month or so.  But for now, I need a nap.

I use Facebook.

Feels good to be able to admit that.  For a long time I had a circle of friends that were into Facebook.  They would keep asking me to join up so that I could do all the cool stuff that they were doing.  Eventually I signed up to see what the big deal was.  It was exactly what I thought it was: a glorified message board.  I lost interest in it quickly.  Those same friends kept using it though, and kept asking me to come back.  What I then learned is that your Facebook experience is what you make of it.  You get out of it what you put into it. 

I then started to take it bit more seriously.  I installed all the silly applications, which in hindsight were...well...silly.  I got rid of those quickly.  I kept finding people to become my Facebook friends.  High school classmates, college drinking buddies, former co-workers.  Many of which I would never have connected with any other way.  My list of friends quickly grew.  But the real clincher was keeping track of their day to day activities.  Yeah, I know that this is following the mundane, but I could not discount its value to me.  I caught myself going back, over and over again.  Now I consider it a worthy networking medium for me.  I think I have figured out how to use it in moderation and now I can recommend it to others. 

Today I did something I haven’t done in at least five years, maybe more.  I played tennis.  Harper and I took on the number one seeded Bobby and Dan.  Dan played in high school and Bobby is about a decade younger than me, so we had our work cut out for us.  So we began.  It was difficult to get that little ball to land in the court, but apparently those are the rules. 

 

We served first and, somehow, won game one.  Then, we won game two.  I think all four of us were kind of confused.  This wasn’t the way it was supposed to go.  It’s at this point the match went more the way we all expected it to go.  They won a game.  Then another and another and they kept on winning, taking the first set six games to two.  We then played another set and son of a gun if the Harper and Ed super team didn’t manage to squeak out four games this time.  We had a long rally to win our final game and I think at this point, I turned to Harper and said, “Yeah, I’m happy with the number of games we won.”  He agreed.  Good for us.  So the final score was 6-2, 6-4. 

 

Overall, this was much more enjoyable than I thought it would be.  Tennis doesn’t sound that fun to me and it sucks almost as much as golf does to watch on TV.  But then again, when is the last time I did something even remotely related to physical competition?  Other than the annual teachers versus students basketball game, I honestly can’t remember.  And this is coming from a former gym rat, who played for hours  at a time on average five times a week for most of my career at the nation’s oldest public university.

 

And doubles tennis hid Harper’s poor forehand and my atrocious backhand.  It also gave me a small area in which to move which helped to save my knees.  Dan told me doubles is old man tennis and I don’t think I can argue.  My knees are sore now, and I couldn’t play again tomorrow, but I could do it again – soon.  If I was playing singles, besides becoming more frustrated and not enjoying myself, I would have really done a number on the old leg benders.  Going side to side and front to back is not the best recipe for Ed’s success.  But if you can let me sneak up to the net, it’s a little challenging because I still have quicker reflexes than one might think and this lets me cover ground without moving a lot.  Score!

I’ve watched more Olympics in the past 72 hours than I have in the last four years.  Wait for it.  Ha!  OK, I’ve watched more Olympics in the past 72 hours than I have in the past twelve years.  My HD television doesn’t mind me watching a lot of sports and this is my first time being able to use my digital cable to watch more than swimming, gymnastics, and track and field.  Over the weekend, I watched some fencing, handball, badminton, men’s cycling, rowing, boxing, and soccer.  Oh, and beach volleyball.  Sigh.  That’s nice.

 

I really want to see a little kayaking – that seems interesting.  And I watched some equestrian crap.  If I wanted stupid sports, I would have tried to find ballroom dancing.  And I find myself really interested in the men’s basketball team.  I watched all of the opening game against China and pulled for everyone (I think this includes Kobe Bryant as well).  I like the story of the Americans reclaiming their title as best basketball nation.  And I like the story of 41 year old swimmer Dara Torres going up against the young stars.  Kristin did not like when I asked her if she was going to look like Ms. Torres when she turns 40.  Actually, I believe she asked if I would look like her.  Touché.

 

At this point, I’d like to share random thoughts about the Olympics.  Not to sound too much like a woman, but the opening ceremonies were awesome.  Also, I learned that after cyclists figure out that they aren’t going to win the event, they just drop out.  They just quit.  Does this seem odd to anyone else?  You’ve trained your entire life for this event.  You fall to fourth place.  Oh well, I’ve got other things to do.  There’s a sale at Pennies.  I’m out.

 

Also, to be more equal, I think men’s beach volleyball should show as much skin as the women do.  It’s just giving people what they want.  Of course, beach volleyball is only there to show beautiful women in bikinis jumping and sweating just for me.  Mission accomplished.  It seems to me that women (and some men) should be able to leer at their favorite men on the beach too.  I’m not going to make this my personal cause, but I’ll sign the petition should anyone pass it around.

 

Dan recently told me I was more naïve than most when it comes to athletes and their use of performance enhancing drugs.  I say this because he was floored that I was really surprised that Roger Clemens was accused of performance-enhancement.  As I was when Barry Bonds was named as a druggy.  As I was when my two favorite players on the Dodgers (former favorites that is), Paul Lo Duca and Eric Gagne, were on the list of stupid baseball rule-breakers.  I say this because I’m really excited about Dara Torres winning medals and being an inspiration to everyone who’s not 18.  Yay oldies!  You don’t think she’s doing anything illegal, do you?  Me either.  It would be so stupid to do that on an international stage.  USA!  USA!  USA!

I have this week left in my summer vacation as well as next week.  I’m reflecting on the latest Summer of Ed and getting ready to spring back into my normal life.  Overall it has been quite successful.  I’ve run and worked out regularly, worked my cushy summer job, read, gone whitewater rafting, set up my retirement account, booked an anniversary trip to Las Vegas, watched a ton of baseball, and stayed out late with my friends.  Hanging out with my friends is something I miss during the school year when I’m getting up at 6:00 and going to bed at 9:30.  I’m going to have to find a way to work this into my normal school life.

 

One of the things I’ve been constantly bombarding Kristin about is my running.  She is running as much or more than I am, but brags far less.  So it seems like I’m running more.  For example, today I ran on an elliptical machine for 45 minutes.  I ran 6.2 miles which I believe is a 10K.  Now I’m not sure how elliptical running translates to real running, but I am proud of this accomplishment.  I started the summer wanting to run a 5K to get back in shape and I’ve moved past that and into new territory.  I don’t think I’ve ever run that far ever so today, August 7th, 2008, I’m at my peak of cardiovascular fitness.  I’m sure in high school while playing soccer I could do that while playing with my Rubric’s Cube, but I think it’s fair to say that I’m in the best shape since I was 25 (ten years ago).

 

I say that because the next month is a critical one for me.  As school starts back, will I renew my gym membership?  Will I run at least three times a week or will I fall back into my normal life?  I don’t want to be less of a teacher, and continuing to go to the gym would make me feel better about myself, reduce my stress at school, and give me a social outlet.  The good thing is this year should be easier than the last two – two years ago I had the stress of my wedding and last year I was working on my national boards.  With me being somewhat of a veteran teacher now, I should be working smarter now and have the ability to handle more extracurricular activities.

 

Hopefully this won’t just end with running, but could spill over into other parts of my life.  I’d enjoy seeing a football or basketball game with my friends or going out on a random Wednesday to have a drink with folks.  I know I wouldn’t be able to do these things super late, but maybe I could stay out until 10:00 once or twice a week.  I don’t need to go crazy, but once every week or two might be nice.  Overall, I want Real Ed to more closely mimic Summer Ed.  Will it happen?  I don’t know.

Tickets for the World Beer Festival go on sale to the general public on August 20th.  $40 a ticket gets you all the beer samples you can keep down of over 300 beers.  And this year’s beer fest will take place at the new Durham Bulls stadium – yep, the DBAP, not the old stadium. 

 

Just like usual, there is an afternoon session and an evening session on October 4th.  Obviously, everyone by now knows that Kristin and I always hit the afternoon session.  It’s seems more about the beer and actual tasting while the evening session has more or a fraternity party feel, although I will admit to really enjoying the chorus of “whoos” every time the sound of glass bottles being poured into a recycling bin echoed across the park during the evening.

 

Tickets are available at Milltown, and last time they sold out before I could procure a pair for me.  So after a one year hiatus, I am ready to hit the ground running and drinking.  If you’re interested in the afternoon session, let me know and I’ll try to get a ticket for you when I’m at Milltown.  To ensure I get my ticket, I will be there on the 20th.  Oh, and give me your cash.  What?  Am I made out of money?

 

I enjoy the chance to try beers I would never try, even the ones I will never try again (Big Foot brutal hop experiment, whatever mead crap my brother gave me).  I enjoyed green apple beer and blueberry, some made with maple syrup, and many that aren’t available in this area.  I really enjoy Sweetwater beers, but unless I go to Asheville or Boone, I’m out of luck on all days except for the beer fest.

 

I will say the crowd gets to me a little more every year, but it’s mostly OK.  The Durham crowd doesn’t annoy me like the Raleigh crowd did.  I can’t explain this, other than maybe I was more relaxed near my home in familiar surroundings than in Capital City.  And the weather can factor into one’s enjoyment – a couple years back it rained prior to us going and basically created a twelve inch layer of mud on the ground.  My brother was wearing flip flops, took two steps and never saw his shoes again.  They were permanently a part of the muddy terrain, and he enjoyed the rest of the tasting in bare feet.

 

All in all, it’s a fun experience and I’d wanted to drum up a little interest in this year’s fun.  With any luck, I’ll see you at the DBAP drinking an array of alcoholic goodness.  I’ll be the tall, awesome guy.  Stop by and say hello.

MG turned 2 recently.  Not quite the monumental birthday of turning 10 (double digits), 13 (teenager), 16 (driving), 18 (adult) or 21 (drinking) but I thought it was eventful none the less.  Oddly enough, I think I have changed more as a result of my daughter getting older than she has.  In honor of my daughter's 2nd birthday, I decided to make a list of things I have learned from watching her.

- If its worth walking to, its worth running to.  No matter how mundane the task, if she makes up her mind to move her body to a new location, she will be running at full speed.  I'm considering doing this throughout my day.
- Communication comes in many forms.  My daughter hasn't quite mastered the English language, but she has picked up some sign language to compensate.  Pretty cool, actually, but it brings on an entirely new set of challenges.  For example, something as simple as talking to her about farm animals could initiate different responses.  If you mention a dog, you might get her to say "dog".  She might decide imitation is the proper communication method by saying either "bow wow" or "ruff ruff".  She might even give you the sign for dog.  Be ready for any and all responses.
- Schedules and routines equal happiness.  Her entire day, whether at home or at daycare is heavily scheduled.  It has to be or else there is chaos.  Besides, she loves the routines and knows them well.  On school days, she knows that Hi5 comes on at 7:08AM (how's that for a specific start time?).
- Doing things you want to do usually come after things you have to do.  There's a lot of bargaining in our house now.  The promise of play time can typically get her to eat a couple more bites at the dinner table.  The potential of computer time or a viewing of Curious George can get her into the bathtub.  She has come to terms with it.
-Sometimes you just need some alone time.  One of the most mature actions I have seen from her.  MG spends her days either with a classroom of other 2 year olds or with her brother.  I have seen her grab a book or a toy and spend some quality time by herself.  I know I need some alone time on occasion, why shouldn't a toddler?

On Saturday, Kristin and I took our nephew, whom I affectionately call Jugdish, to Adventure Landing in Raleigh. On the trip over, he told us that he hopes Barack Obama beats John McCain. That was nice - now we all had something we could agree on, although I learned when you pushed him on the issues, he had a difficult time articulating his beliefs. Anyway, we got there early so there weren’t that many people there and we had the place more or less to ourselves for a while.

We let him play all the skateboarding/motorcycling/race car driving games he could handle. We played games where you knock over ducks with a boxing glove and went on a roller coaster simulation that rocked up all over the place and scared the little fella. Awww, isn’t that precious? Then he disturbed us greatly when he saw a dinosaur shooting game, grabbed the blue gun out of the holster and boldly stated he wanted to play. He then told me to watch as he turned the gun ninety degrees to the left, giving his shooting a little bit of a “gangsta” feel. I should have asked the five-year-old where he learned that, but instead my mouth fell agape as he terminated those dino-punks.

Deciding a change in venue was appropriate, we went outside to the go-kart track. Totally awesome! Since Jugdish was under 56 inches tall, I “had” to ride with him. Ha! They had these cool little two-seater cars with a steering wheel in front of both seats, but only one that worked. Luckily, I sat behind the working one and we were off. We must have passed 5-6 cars, inside, outside, you name it, we did it. Juggy was turning his wheel as we hit the turns, and we laughed as we passed these non-driving fools. Only one car passed us, a dorky little man accompanied by his little girl bumped us and went around us like we were standing still. We were on a straightaway so I don’t think he was a better driver than me – I just think he had a better engine or less weight. I momentarily thought about lightening my load, but then I considered the consequences. We started and two-person team, we’d end a two-person team.

We finished up, drove home, watched a little Pokemon, and his mom picked him up. Afterwards, Kristin and I took our normal nap after spending time with little people. All in all, a good time was had by all. I am much more comfortable with a kid that isn’t a newborn, one that understands consequences, and one that can handle their liquor (I kid, I joke with you!). It’s a fun day to breeze in, play aunt and uncle for a short spell, and then renew our awesome childfree lifestyle. Go us!

This morning, Kristin and I got up, went out to eat breakfast, and discussed what we were going to do with our day.  We were feeling adventurous so we decided to go on a little tour of the Foothills Brewery, located in downtown Winston-Salem.  I like our life.  Getting to take a day trip on the spur of the moment rocks.  I had heard of the brewery from drinking their Pilot Mountain Pale Ale at Tyler’s Taproom near the DBAP.  It was good and I thought “Why not go to the source?”

 

Established way back in aught-four, the Foothills Brewery reminded me a little of my Great Lakes experience in Cleveland.  We sat at the bar and decided to share a beer sampler which let us enjoy seven of their beers.  Awesome!  All of their beers were excellent, from the darker Total Eclipse Stout to the crisp Salem Gold.  I think samplers are a very good deal - $7.99 for seven mini-beers.  Our bartender was nice enough to let me try the one on tap not included in the sampler, the Seeing Double IPA.  This is the first high gravity beer they’ve crafted, and it seems like one of these would definitely do the trick.

 

In case you’re interested, here are the beers we sampled and my opinion of them:

 

• Total Eclipse Stout: dark, thick, oatmeal stout – always start with the darkest
• Rainbow Trout ESB: an amber tasting beer, with a little nuttiness and chocolate – although I didn’t taste the chocolate
• Hoppyum IPA: hoppy is right, it was described as having pungent hops – do they need a marketing director? - but we both liked it
• Hurricane Hefeweizen: sweet and cloudy, bordering on too sweet for our tastes
• Torch Pilsner: this was our favorite – not too light – no silly extra flavors – just a straightforward good beer
• Pilot Mountain Pale Ale:  this is the one I’d had before, excellent – the only one I think you can get in bars around here
• Salem Gold:  reminded me of the Great Lakes Dortmunder Gold without the aftertaste
• Seeing Double IPA:  correctly named, 9.5% ABV, this one affected my decision making ability

 

After the sampler, we split some pretzels and each chose a pint to enjoy – I selected another Rainbow Trout and a Torch Pilsner for the lady.  After an hour and a half of good company and good beer, we hopped back in the car and headed back to Durham.  Eighty-five miles later, we eased into our driveway and made it back to the bedroom, where I don’t want to say too much, but we totally took an awesome beer nap. 

 

If you’re looking for a little trip that’s not too far, consider this one.  If you like beer and live in North Carolina, why not?