April 07, 2007

Inside UFO 54-40

[Ramblings] 
Over at my parent’s house, I made my way up to the attic and found several boxes of books from many years ago.  I found some of my favorites from Dr. Suess to my Frog and Toad books.  I then stumbled upon my super cool “Choose Your Own Adventure” books.  Kristin asked me what made these so cool.  How had she not heard of these?  I don’t think these are just for guys, are they?

These have been around forever, and the basic idea is that you don’t read them straight through – you make a choice and then turn to the appropriate page to see what happens to you.  It may say something like “If you decide to hit the old lady, turn to page 23; if you decide to give her a big hug, turn to page 42.”  Then it continues the story and you see if you have a happy ending or a sad one.  

Anyway, I came across the most evil “Choose Your Own Adventure” book ever made.  If you know this book, you already know the title I’m about to say and why indeed, it sucks.  It’s called Inside UFO 54-40, and the idea is that this spaceship captures you and you are trying to get to Ultima, the world of paradise.  As a child, I read this book, trying every possible choice, and never reached Ultima.  I even read it straight through, looking for that option to turn to page 101, which sends you to the final destination.  

Yeah, Ultima is in there.  I’ve read the ending.  It’s nice.  It makes you feel like you’ve done something with your life.  But there’s no way to get there.  No choice gives you the chance to reach Ultima.  It’s an ending you can’t reach.  Why do this to a guy?  One avid reader said this book ruined his childhood.  I agree.  What kind of sadistic author receives pleasure from purposely keeping me from Ultima?  This is a question that needs an answer.

Posted by ed at 09:59 | Comments (4) | Trackbacks (0)

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Comments
Re: Inside UFO 54-40
I read this book as a kid too.

I believe there's a picture near the Ultima pages.

When flipping through the book looking for the page I was supposed to go to I found it and subsequently tried to find out how to get there.

At least that's what I remember... I don't think I made a habit of reading the "Choose Your Own Adventure" books from beginning to end.
Posted by:

Daniel Fisher at April 07,2007 10:48

Re: Inside UFO 54-40
Some Internet-dweebs photoshopped a bunch of funny covers for their twisted "Choose your own Adventure" books:

http://www.somethingawful.com/d/comedy-goldmine/choose-your-own.php

(There's multiple pages of them...)

I particularly liked this one:
http://images.somethingawful.com/mjolnir/images/cg04052005/CosmoDNA1.jpg
Posted by:

Daniel Fisher at April 07,2007 10:57

Re: Inside UFO 54-40
What right do you have to complain? The author outright _tells_ you early on that you can't get to Ultima by making any kind of choice, and sure enough he's right!
Posted by:

Joe at February 07,2008 02:06

Re: Inside UFO 54-40
That book was cool. Throughout the book it kept giving you hints how to find Ultima. You get told by a character that "Ultima does exist, but you can't choose to go there". other characters say stuff like if you look hard enough you will find it.

The page where you reach Ultima starts by saying "You don't know how you got here but..."

I think it's a great twist in the book and makes kids think. I remember being so excited when I found it on page 101, and understood the meaning of the clues I had been given
Posted by:

Simon at July 31,2008 20:07

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